Charge Price Comic Strips - Page 5

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176 Results for Charge Price

View 41 - 50 results for charge price comic strips. Discover the best "Charge Price" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 16, 2007's comic on:


Tags #charge your time, #appropriate code, #unfunded, #time codes, #falsify report, #no projects funded, #meeting, #business

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The Boss: "Remember to charge your time to the appropriate project code." "Unless your project is unfunded, in which case the time codes won't work and you'll need to falsify your time report." Alice: "Are any of our projects funded?" The Boss: "This is the embarrassing part."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 14, 2007's comic on:


Tags #25 each, #cheap hot dogs, #cover charge, #employee appreciation day, #evil director, #harder to appreciate, #pocket money

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Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources Catbert: Employee Appreciation Day is next Tuesday. The cover charge is $25 apiece. wally: How do we know you won't buy cheap hot dogs and pocket the rest of our money? Catbert: Every day it gets harder to appreciate you." gulp gulp gulp

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 23, 2007's comic on:


Tags #pr campaign, #stock price, #grossly inflated, #buy companies, #make money, #manage companies

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Dogbert: Thanks to my P.R. campaign, your stock price is grossly over-inflated." "Now you can use your stock to buy companies that actually make money." "After you manage those companies into the toilet, give me a jingle."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 03, 2008's comic on:


Tags #project, #customer calls, #can't deliver on time, #features needed, #getting waterboarded, #birthday, #price went up

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Dilbert: My project is on hold. Do you need any help on yours? Alice: Sure. Call these customers and tell them we can't deliver on time or with the features they need. Dilbert: Do you have any tasks that don't feel like getting waterboarded on your birthday? Alice: And tell them the price went up."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 18, 2008's comic on:


Tags #complain, #garbage, #job, #trash, #new assignment, #troll in charge, #legacy systems, #shouldn't complain, #economy, #free bag of garbage, #business

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Dilbert: My new assignment is "troll in charge of the legacy systems." I guess I shouldn't complain. I'm lucky to have a job in this economy. Garbageman: Would a free bag of garbage make you feel better? Dilbert: A little.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 25, 2007's comic on:


Tags #in charge, #assignment, #budget, #approve expenses, #report, #project plan, #take blame, #project failed

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The Boss: You'll be in charge of this project. Dilbert: What's my budget?" The Boss: I'll need to approve all expenses. Dilbert: Who will report to me? The Boss: Your team will report to me and I'll tell them what to do. Dilbert: I'll start on the project plan. The Boss: Um... Skip that part. I already have a plan in my head. Dilbert: Hypothetically, who would take the blame if this project failed? Well, you're in charge...

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 22, 2007's comic on:


Tags #stock holder meeting, #gadflies, #stock price dropped, #sleep at night

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Stockholder meeting CEO: Do we have any questions from Gadflies? You earned 72 million dollars while our stick price dropped nine percent. How can you sleep at night? CEO: ZZZZZ

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 13, 2007's comic on:


Tags #compete on price, #quality features, #fraud, #marketing, #business

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The Boss: "We can't compete on price." "We also can't compete on quality features or service." "That leaves fraud, which I'd like you call marketing."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 08, 2007's comic on:


Tags #charge less, #enginners, #honesty, #stop, #brilliant suggestion

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The boss: Explain why you charge less of your time to projects than all the other engineers. Dilbert: "I'm trying something new. It's called honesty." The Boss: "Stop doing that." Dilbert: "Okay brilliant suggestion."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 05, 2007's comic on:


Tags #price quite, #taxes, #shipping, #cable, #carts, #software, #memory, #upgrades, #maintence, #insurance, #needy, #engineering

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"That price quote includes everything!" Dilbert: "What about taxes, shipping, cables, carts, software, memory upgrades, maintenance and insurance?" "Has anyone ever called you needy?"