Clothes Microwave Comic Strips - Page 5

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122 Results for Clothes Microwave

View 41 - 50 results for clothes microwave comic strips. Discover the best "Clothes Microwave" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 23, 2004's comic on:


Tags #performance review, #meetings, #too negative, #poo posed ideas, #cold fusion, #perpetual motion, #clothes dryer, #antigravity pants, #mri vending machine, #terrible ideas, #negative attitude, #tongue scraper

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"Performance review" "People say you're too negative in meetings." "Negative? When?" "According to the marketing department, you poo-pooed a number of their ideas..." "...The cold fusion scooter, perpetual motion clothes dryer, antigravity pants, MRI vending machine, and the list goes on." "Those are terrible ideas!" "Negative attitude!!! Gottcha!!!" "Okay, you're right. From now on, I will support all terrible ideas." "Good." "It's a tongue scraper and a frozen flagpole!" "Can it be electrified?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 30, 2013's comic on:


Tags #complaining, #depression (mental state), #inventions, #self worth, #doubt, #microwave, #machine language, #kill me, #beep

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Robot: You keep giving me trivial assignments that make me doubt my self-worth. Boss: Chill out. You don't hear the microwave whining all day long. Robot: He doesn't know that the machine word for "Please kill me is 'Beep.'" Microwave: Beep.

Dilbert Reduces Decisions

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Dilbert Reduces Decisions - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 30, 2014's comic on:


Tags #attractive, #clothes, #clothing, #dating, #deciding, #decisions, #eliminates decisons, #fine tuning, #system, #tube clothes, #relationships

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Dilbert: I only wear tube clothes now because it reduces my number of daily decisions. Tina: You mean decisions such as... where to go on a date? Because I don't see that coming up. Dilbert: I'm still fine-tuning the system.

Tube Clothing At The Bar

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Tube Clothing At The Bar - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 01, 2015's comic on:


Tags #clothing, #dating, #jobs, #low standards, #tube clothes, #values substance, #employment, #relationships

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Dilbert: I noticed you eyeing my tube clothes. You're thinking I am a man who values substance over style and it turns you on. Woman: No, I'm thinking I'll date anything that has a job. Dilbert: I have one of those!

Tube Clothing Or Rug

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Tube Clothing Or Rug - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 07, 2015's comic on:


Tags #clothes, #clothing, #insult, #nerd, #nerds, #style, #tube clothes, #invented style, #reduce decisions, #carpet, #wrapped

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Dilbert: Tube clothes! I invented that style! Did it reduce the number of decisions you need to make every day? Man: I'm just a guy wrapped in a carpet. Dilbert: Oh, I thought you were like me. Man: I don't have to take these insults.

Showering In Tube Clothes

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Showering In Tube Clothes - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 08, 2015's comic on:


Tags #clothes, #clothing, #efficiency, #engineers, #laundry, #nerd, #tube clothes, #shower, #shower drain

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Dilbert: I discovered that I can wear my tube clothing in the shower! It's like doing laundry and taking a shower at the same time! I can add one more efficiency, but I'd need to replumb the shower drain. Tina: Please stop talking!!!

Ghosts Use Bitcoin

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Ghosts Use Bitcoin - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 10, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #money, #die, #ghost, #password, #bitcoin, #clothes

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boss drinking coffee: they say you can't take your money with you when you die. but does that include bitcoin? because even a ghost can remember a password. dilbert: why would a ghost need money? boss: have you never noticed they all wear clothes?

Bad Judge Of Character

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Bad Judge Of Character  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 29, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #bad, #judge, #character, #hire, #termite, #clothes, #disguise, #youtube, #makeup, #video

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boss wearing face mask: i'm starting to think i'm a bad judge of character. the last three people i hired turned out to be termite colonies in clothes. dilbert in face mask: how did they disguise the face part? boss: they learned from youtube makeup videos.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 23, 1989's comic on:


Tags #laundry

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Dilbert looks into the washing machine and says, "I knew I shouldn't have left the laundry in the washer all night." Dogbert says, "I'll get a chisel." Dilbert takes the clothes out and says, "It seems to have coagulated into a grotesque dried-up-fiber-donut-sculpture-kind-of-a-thing." Dilbert points to the bundle and says, "I think this is a sleeve of my sport coat." Dogbert asks, "Do you want that in a size 38?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 10, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #static, #electricity, #usless, #resistor, #dog of thunder, #nerd, #puns, #annoys

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Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Maybe since you're full of static electricity, you should say 'it is useless to be a resistor.' Hee-hee-hee." Dogbert's fur is standing up. Dogbert zaps Dilbert with an electric shock. Clouds of smoke rise from Dilbert's head and his clothes are charred. Dogbert says as he walks away, "Nothing annoys the 'Dog of Thunder' quite as much as nerd puns."