Competition Amongst Mothers Comic Strips - Page 5

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117 Results for Competition Amongst Mothers

View 41 - 50 results for competition amongst mothers comic strips. Discover the best "Competition Amongst Mothers" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 18, 1994's comic on:


Tags #board room, #fire employees, #no employees, #task force, #competitors, #white rumps

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EXECUTIVE BOARD ROOM TED: our competitors are kicking our pasty white rumps. Ted: Im bringing in dogcart to fire employees until we're stronger than the competition. Man: How will the work get done with no employees? Ted: Id better form a test force to study that.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 30, 1995's comic on:


Tags #Advice, #dogbert consulting comapny, #business units, #cross cahrging, #undermining, #comepotition, #healthy, #janitorial

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The Boss, Dilbert, Wally and Alice sit at a conference table. The Boss points to a diagram on an overhead projector and says, "We're going to follow the advice of the Dogbert Consulting Company and form 'Battlin' Business Units.'" The Boss continues, "We'll spend most of our time cross-charging and undermining the other BBU's." Wally comments, "A little competition is healthy." The Boss adds, "Whatever you do, DON'T tick off the janitorial BBU."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 23, 1996's comic on:


Tags #problem, #quietly sit, #look mangerly, #idiotic, #leadership, #iron man, #team building, #bunch leadership

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The Boss sits at his desk thinking, "I don't know how to fix any of the problems in this company. Maybe I'll just sit here quietly." The Boss thinks, "No, that wouldn't look managerly . . . I'll have to do something idiotic and hope it looks like leadership." The Boss says to Dilbert, who is sitting at his desk, "We're going to have an 'Iron Man' team-building competition." Dilbert replies, "What a bunch of leadership . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 29, 1999's comic on:


Tags #bill agtes, #bill gates, #competition keeper, #infrared, #linus rules, #linux box, #missiles, #sent email, #visit mom, #dilberts mother

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Dilbert's mom and Dilbert sit on the couch in Dilbert's living room. Dilbert's mom says, "...I'm going to infrared from the keyboard to my "linux" box." She has a keyboard on her lap. Dilbert says, "Nice mom" Dilbert's mom makes a fist and says, "I just sent a flaming e-mail to Bill gates, saying "Linux rules!" Dilbert says, "you what?" Bill gates sits in captians chair in a military looking facility. Bill says, "Launch the competitionkeeper missiles."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 22, 2002's comic on:


Tags #bankrupt, #401k money gone, #investing, #competitors stock, #wally rich, #investing in competition

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Wally is sitting at his computer. Alice approaches and says, "Wally, what are we going to do now that we're bankrupt and our 401k money is gone?" Wally responds, "No problem. I've been investing all of my money in our competitor's stock. Now I'm rich." Alice asks, "Why do you still come to work?" Wally responds, "I don't know how to make coffee."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 26, 2004's comic on:


Tags #dance with death, #secreatry, #desk, #work to early grave, #first to drop, #good morning, #first thing, #competition, #resentment, #anger

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Carol: "Well, look who came back to dance with death." "Once again you will try to work me to an early grave and I will book you on dangerous business trips." "Who will be the first to drop? Who?" The boss: "What ever happened to 'good morning'?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 18, 2006's comic on:


Tags #business, #competition, #sales, #sales personnel

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The land of unrealistic business assumptions. Dilbert: We need to find some assumptions about future sales. Dang! There's only one way across and it's blocked by an inebriated hillbilly. Dogbert: In the land of unrealistic assumptions, this guy is your only competitor.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 13, 2006's comic on:


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I invented a search engine that's also a singles matching service. "It automatically matches singles who search for the same keywords." "And then it threatens to e-mail those keywords to their mothers if they don't agree to date." "I have taught you well."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 24, 2006's comic on:


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"Wally has a laziness disability. If you fire him, I will sue you for violating labor laws." "Furthermore, he is part endangered butterfly, on his mother's side." "As we speak, he's looking for a workplace hazard to roll around in."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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"Vlad is here to tell us why it's so important to donate blood." "Blood is totally delicious and I'm too lazy to bite necks." "You're not with the Red Cross, are you." "Competition is healthy too."