Doing Less Work Comic Strips - Page 5

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View 41 - 50 results for doing less work comic strips. Discover the best "Doing Less Work" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 12, 2005's comic on:


Tags #new guy, #strong culture, #doing teask, #unimaginable, #getting suckers, #to do our work

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The New Guy" "We have a strong culture of team--work here." "While you're doing those easy tasks, I'll be off doing assignments of unimaginable diffuculty." Dilbert: "Did anyone warn you that we have a strong culture of getting suckers to do our work?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 10, 2006's comic on:


Tags #less prodcutive, #automatic promotion, #hiring, #work like idiot, #look like idiot, #pointy haired alice

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"Alice, I need you to be less productive." "I'll get an automatic promotion if I can justify hiring one more direct report." "If I'm going to work like an idiot, I might as well look like one."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 04, 2008's comic on:


Tags #class, #less useless, #carry coffee cups, #work faster, #two hands

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Wally says, "I took a class to learn how to be less useless." Wally says, "Now I carry twice as many coffee cups wherever I go." Carol says, "Does that make you work faster?" Wally says, "I only have two hands."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 17, 2008's comic on:


Tags #users want, #supply and emnad, #idiot, #managing, #work harder, #earn less money, #fire me, #obvious things

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The Boss says, "Find out what the users want before your build it." Dilbert says, "Why are you explaining my job to me as if I'm an idiot?" The Boss says, "It's called managing." The Boss says, "I assume you're dumb because you work harder than I do and earn less money." The Boss says, "And my boss would fire me if I just sat in my office and did nothing." The Boss says, "So I wander around and say obvious thing to you idiots until quitting time." The Boss says, "Then I go home and eat until my underpants don't fit." The Boss says, "Thanks for asking."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 17, 2014's comic on:


Tags #efficiency experts, #friendship, #money, #you won't quit, #friends at work, #pay less, #relationships

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Boss: Experts say you'll be more engaged if you have a friend at work. And when you're engaged, I can pay you less and you won't quit. Dilbert: So this guy is costing me money? Wally: Don't flatter yourself. I barely know your name.

Dilbert Breaks Up With Work Wife

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Dilbert Breaks Up With Work Wife - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 10, 2016's comic on:


Tags #Women, #wives, #wife, #work spouse, #game, #scam, #ruse, #relationships

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Dilbert: Alice, I am breaking up with you as my work wife. Tina complains less and she sends me on fewer errands, so I choose her. Alice: What's your game? Tina: I'm running a bait-and-switch on him.

Only Work If You'd Rather Do Something Else

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Only Work If You'd Rather Do Something Else - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 14, 2016's comic on:


Tags #fulfillment, #happiness, #satisfaction, #work ethic, #motivation, #psychology

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Boss: Remember, it's only work if you'd rather be doing something else! Tina: I would rather do anything else. Boss: Oh. In that case, you're trapped in a nightmare that never ends. Tina: I have a lot riding on the afterlife.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 01, 2017's comic on:


Tags #happiness, #work, #torture, #human resources, #hr, #manipulation, #content, #psychology, #business

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Catbert: The one called Dilbert is showing signs of happiness at work. Boss: That means we can give him more work and he won't quit. Excellent. Is anyone else exhibiting signs of unauthorized happiness? Catbert: No. Everyone else is in the narrow band of misery you want them to be in. If they were any happier, it would mean you're overpaying them. If they were any less happy, the would take their own lives. If you don't hear any laughing or screaming, it means you're doing something right. Boss: What about moans? Catbert: Moans are ideal. That's the sweet spot.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 14, 2011's comic on:


Tags #cruelty, #frustration, #idea, #never work, #reject hypothesis, #self doubt

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Man: Your idea will never work. Dilbert: At what point did you reject the hypothesis that you're too dumb to understand how good the idea is? I'm becoming even less of a people person.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 18, 1989's comic on:


Tags #homeless persons, #real estate, #less fortunate

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Dilbert sits at his desk. Dogbert says, "I've decided to dedicate my life to the less fortunate." Dilbert replies, "That's very noble of you, Dogbert. Will you be working with the homeless, or perhaps the hungry?" Dogbert replies, "I thought I'd start with people who didn't buy real estate in the 70's . . . Maybe work my way up to that other stuff."