Drop In Comic Strips - Page 5

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52 Results for Drop In

View 41 - 50 results for drop in comic strips. Discover the best "Drop In" comics from Dilbert.com.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #art, #modern art, #nonsense, #taste, #culture

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Famous artist Dogberto will tell us his plans for our lobby. "I plan to buy a drop cloth at Home Depot and drape it over the security desk." "Won't that be hard on the guard?" "Not until I douse it with gas and light it."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

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"I'm Betty the Bulldozer, and I always get what I want!" "Drop everything and start doing my bidding now, intern!" "This was just a test. Wait here until I need something." shiver

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

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Drop the cell phone. I darn you to heck. blah blah blah "Seriously. Don't make me use the spoon." blah blah blah "I'm sorry it had to come to this."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

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"I need you to drop whatever you're doing and work all night to make this change to your system." "If you refuse to do my bidding, here's the rumor I will spread about you." "Ha! I'll say I was only scratching an itch." "Good luck with that."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #competition (psychology), #laziness, #passive job seeker, #rope, #sleeping, #tied up, #coffee cup, #chair, #bound

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Recruiters Recruiter 1: Hey, is that a passive job seeker? Wally: ZZZZZZ. Recruiter 2: Back off! I saw him first. This rope hols my place until he wakes up. Wally: ZZZZZZ. I will pay you a thousand dollars to drop a long straw in this cup.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cruelty, #honesty, #managers & supervisors, #motivation, #insincere, #bar too high, #low motivation, #business

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Dilbert: My motivation is low today. I understand it's your job to fix that situation. An insincere attaboy or a fake interest in my life would be enough. Boss: Drop dead and let the flies eat you. Dilbert: I set the bar too high again.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #conversation, #deception, #insincere compliments, #make likable, #didn't spill, #no change

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Dilbert: I read that using people's names and giving insincere compliments will make me likeable. Good job pouring that coffee, Wally. You didn't spill a drop. Wally: I don't feel any different. Dilbert: Maybe the problem is on your end.

Wally's Stress Problem

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Wally's Stress Problem - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #stress, #health, #work, #employee, #work ethic, #laziness, #excuse

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Wally: I need to take an extended medical leave to deal with my job-related stress. The stress is degrading my cardiovascular system. I could drop dead any minute. Boss: Which part of your job is causing stress? Wally: I think it's the work part.

Twitter Complaints

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Twitter Complaints - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #customer servie, #customer support, #trolling, #social media, #popularity, #technology

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Dilbert: We're getting a lot of product complaints on Twitter. Boss: Tell those trolls to shut up and leave us alone. Dilbert: Uh... okay. CEO: Why did our stock just drop to zero? Boss: Sounds like a seasonal thing.

Ted Might Drop Dead

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Ted Might Drop Dead - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #health, #monitor, #fitbit, #wearable tech, #heart attack, #diseases, #death, #prediction, #medical

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Boss: Ted, your performance is poor. I need to let you go. Ted: Is it a coincidence that you're firing me at the same time my employee health monitor detected cardiovascular disease? How good are the predictive analytics on this? Boss: Don't make lunch plans.