Hurt Feelings Comic Strips - Page 5
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101 Results for Hurt Feelings
View 41 - 50 results for hurt feelings comic strips. Discover the best "Hurt Feelings" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday May 08,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #cool, #guys, #Women, #miss, #killing, #me, #trash, #dating, #love
Transcript
Dilbert thinks, "I've noticed that all the cool guys use gentle kidding with women. Women must like it." Dilbert walks up behind a woman and says, "Excuse me, miss, does your face hurt? It's killing me!" Dilbert giggles and snorts. Dilbert is stuffed upside down in a garbage can. Dilbert thinks, "The cool guys must hate it when this happens to them."
Tuesday September 04,
1990
Tags #dinosaur, #massage, #masseur, #miracle, #spa, #angry, #bob, #Dogbert, #age, #client
Transcript
Dogbert says to Bob the Dinosaur, "Bob, I'd like you to be the masseur for my New Age Miracle Spa." Bob replies, "Dinosaurs don't know much about massage." Dogbert says, "That's okay. Just hurt the clients as much as possible." Bob asks, "Won't they get angry?" Dogbert replies, "Bob, Bob, Bob . . . You really aren't tuned to the New Age, are you?"
Saturday January 05,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #volkswagen, #car accident
Transcript
Dogbert enters looking dazed and Dilbert asks, "Dogbert! What happened to you?" Dogbert replies, "I was hit by a Volkswagen." Dilbert bends down and asks, "Does it hurt?" Dogbert says, "I feel like fahrvergnugen."
Thursday December 31,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #engineer, #electronics, #devices, #techno bill, #cellular, #phone, #modem, #dial, #systems, #autodialing
Transcript
Dilbert says to another engineer with electronic devices strapped to his body, "Please don't hurt me, Techno-Bill!" Bill says, "Make your move." Dilbert thinks, "My only chance is to use my cellular phone and modem to dial into his control module and set off all his systems." Techno-Bill says as he presses a button on his cellular phone, "Fool! I have autodialing." Dilbert runs away screaming as the gadgets on his belt ring and beep.
Saturday January 30,
1993
Tags #Dilbert, #women and men, #dating, #relationships, #prices, #feelings, #emotions
Transcript
Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. The woman says, "I like a man who isn't afraid to cry." Dilbert puts his head on the table and sobs, "Waah! Waah! The prices here are so high! Waah! Waah!" Dilbert thinks, "It's not working. She tricked me." The woman looks at the menu and says, "I'll just have water, I think."
Monday December 20,
1993
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #christmas, #dog
Transcript
Dilbert sits on the couch and Dogbert stands on the armrest. Dogbert hands Dilbert a list and says, "Here's a list of my Christmas demands." Dogbert says, "Follow the instructions and nobody gets hurt." Dilbert says, "You're bluffing. You wouldn't hurt my plastic window Santa." Dogbert holds the electric cord to the decoration and says, "One yank and he's off life support!"
Saturday June 04,
1994
Tags #inflation eating, #no real opportunity, #other compnaies, #downsizing, #miss the 80s, #get away with anything
Transcript
The Boss: "You've got inflation eating you from the bottom...and no real opportunity for a promotion." "And as long as all the other companies are downsizing too, you have no leverage. I can get away with anything!" Dilbert: "I miss the eighties." The Boss: "Does this hurt?"
Monday July 18,
1994
Tags #great solutions, #bicycle seats, #dorky pants, #bicycle pants
Transcript
GREAT SOLUTIONS IN ENGINEERING Problem: Bicycle seats are hard. They Hurt. Analysis: there must be something work with your pants, Dogbert: Solution: dorky pants.
Thursday December 29,
1994
Tags #horse drink, #lead a horse to water, #stick a hose, #tape hose in mouth, #horse drink water
Transcript
Dogbert and Ratbert sit on the couch armrest. Dogbert says, "Remember the old saying, Ratbert: you can lead a horse to water . . ." Dogbert continues, ". . . But by the time you got there you'd smell like a horse and your butt would hurt." Ratbert asks, "If you stuck a hose in a horse's mouth and taped it there, could you make the horse drink?" Dogbert replies, "Yeah, I've tried it."
Tuesday March 28,
1995
Tags #fetch coffee, #surprise you, #kicked into hat, #alice, #elbonian, #sexist, #coffee wench
Transcript
Alice, Dilbert, Wally and an Elbonian sit around a conference table. The Elbonian hands a coffee cup to Alice who says, "In this country we have a custom when men ask women to fetch coffee." Alice continues, "Stand up . . . That's it . . . Now this will really surprise you." Dilbert and Wally cover their eyes and Wally says, "Oh God." A hat with feet sticking out of it sits on the chair where the Elbonian was sitting. Wally says, "I've never seen anybody get kicked into his hat before." Dilbert says, "That's gotta hurt."