Inventing Words Comic Strips - Page 5

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129 Results for Inventing Words

View 41 - 50 results for inventing words comic strips. Discover the best "Inventing Words" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 20, 2011's comic on:


Tags #computers & peripherals, #language, #no longer undertsnd, #employees, #to of touch, #technology, #gravitons, #warp drive, #rebalanced, #subspace responders, #business

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Boss: I no longer understand anything my employees say. I must be so out of touch with technology that I don't even recognize the words. Wally: I flushed the gravitons out of the warp drive and rebalanced the subspace responders.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 18, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #opera, #weasels, #heavy metal rock

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Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dogbert asks, "You know what kind of music I hate?" Dogbert continues, "When they wear those outrageous outfits, scream like tortured weasels and nobody understands the words." Dilbert asks, "Heavy metal rock?" Dogbert replies, "Opera."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 07, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #nuclear, #power, #project, #inspection, #report

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Dilbert arrives home carrying a briefcase and says to Dogbert, "I got transferred to the Glickman Nuclear Power Project." Dogbert asks, "Aren't you worried about radiation?" Dilbert replies, "My boss says the last safety inspection was quite favorable." Dogbert asks, "What were his EXACT words?" Dilbert answers, ". . . The inspectors gave a glowing report." Dogbert says, "Maybe you'll mutate into something smarter."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 21, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #chainsaw, #weasel, #prune, #computer, #skipper

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Dilbert sits at his desk working on his computer and Dogbert sits next to him. Dilbert says, "My computer has determined the funniest words in the world . . ." Dilbert continues, "They include: chainsaw, weasel, prune and any reference to 'Gilligan's Island.' Now I can make my own jokes!" Dilbert says to Dogbert, ". . . So then the skipper gets attacked by this prune-eating weasel with a chainsaw . . ." Dogbert laughs.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 07, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #dinosaurs, #robber, #dawn, #bob, #honesty, #bat, #flush, #swirly

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The thief comes to the door and Dogbert says, "Greetings." The crook says, "Hey! Ain't you the worthless watchdog from dat Dilbert guy's house I robbed?" Dogbert points to Bob and Dawn the Dinosaurs and says, "I'd like you to meet Dawn and Bob who will say a few words about honesty." Dawn is holding a bat. Bob and Dawn hold the thief upside down by his ankles. Bob says, ". . . And honesty means never having to say 'please don't flush me down the toilet.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 12, 2012's comic on:


Tags #10 million, #cloud start up, #social media, #venture capital, #location based, #flattering, #investment, #technology

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Venture Capital Dogbert: I need $100,000 for my location-based, social media, could start-up. Coworker: I'm not giving you $100,000 just because you spewed some buzz-words. Dogbert: The how about $10 million? Coworker: Wait... now it sounds like a good investment. How did you do that? Dogbert: I can tell you, but it won't be flattering.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 11, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #marketing, #brent, #engineering, #micorwave, #oven, #computer, #workstation, #forever, #croissant

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A woman says to Dilbert, "So, you're temporarily assigned to marketing and Brent went to engineering?" Dilbert replies, "Yeah . . ." In engineering, Brent points to a computer and asks, "What kind of microwave oven is this?" Wally replies, "That's a fifty MIP Sparc workstation, Brent." Brent places a croissant on the monitor and thinks, "In other words, it's going to take FOREVER to warm my croissant."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 28, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #phone, #pager, #palm computer, #personal, #organizer, #wireless, #modem, #envy, #engineers, #thesaurus

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Dilbert stands in front of the dresser wearing a belt with several pieces of electronic equipment attached to it. Dilbert says, "Let's see . . . I've got my cellular phone, my pager, palm computer, personal organizer, wireless modem . . ." Dilbert looks in the mirror and continues, "Yeah, I'd say I'm pretty much the envy of engineers everywhere . . . Looking good . . . Looking good . . ." Dogbert says, "Words escape me . . ." Dilbert takes something out of his belt and says, "Here, I'll fire up the old thesaurus."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 15, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #brochure, #seminar, #management, #zombies, #utilize, #paradigm, #vertical, #empowerment, #proactive

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Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss says, "I got a brochure for 'Dogbert's Seminar on Management Zombies.' I think you should go." Dilbert reads the pamphlet, "Learn how to use words like: utilize, paradigm, vertical, empowerment, and proactive in every sentence." Dilbert says, "I'm not sure I want to talk like that." The Boss says, "Come . . . Join us . . . Don't be afraid . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 31, 1994's comic on:


Tags #darwinian saga, #evolution, #invet computers, #ironic twist, #monkey, #own species, #tail, #animals

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Zimbu: Your big mistake, evolution wise, was inventing computers that are easier to use if you have a tail. Its an ironic twist in the darwinian saga, You've guaranteed the extinction of your own species. Dilbert: Stop working while In talking to you Zimbu!! Zimbu: I can hear the evolutionary clock...tick tick...tick...tick...