Low Cost Comic Strips - Page 5
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290 Results for Low Cost
View 41 - 50 results for low cost comic strips. Discover the best "Low Cost" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday August 01,
1996
Tags #supreme ruler, #earth, #landslide, #low votor, #benevolent ruler, #caning, #olympic event
Transcript
Dogbert stands behind Dilbert's desk and says, "The votes are in. I've been elected to the position of Supreme Ruler of Earth." Dogbert says, "I won in a landslide, thanks to low voter turnout and the fact that I voted for myself many times." Dilbert says, "I hope you'll be a benevolent ruler." Dogbert says, "I think I'll make caning an Olympic event."
Friday August 23,
1996
Tags #all year, #asok the intern, #awards, #built unit, #design, #minor change, #weekend, #working, #half cost
Transcript
The caption says, "Asok the Intern." Dilbert, Alice, Asok and Wally sit at a conference table. Asok says, "I came in over the weekend and looked at the design you've been working with all year." Asok continues, "It turns out that you could have built the unit at half the cost with just one minor change." Asok continues, "Is it true I can win awards for this sort of thing?" Alice whispers to Wally, "Fetch the internapult."
Monday August 26,
1996
Tags #Catbert, #high morale?, #hr director, #love feedback, #morale is low, #more frequent reviews, #employees underpaid
Transcript
Catbert stands on the Boss's desk and says, "Morale is low because the employees are underpaid." Catbert continues, "You can compensate by having more frequent performance reviews. They love feedback." Catbert clenches his teeth and thinks, "The hardest part is keeping a straight face." The Boss says, "Tell me again why I'd want morale to be high?"
Wednesday November 27,
1996
Tags #school for interpersonal skills, #Dogbert, #good relationships, #huge phony, #three fundamentals, #loud, #simple, #smiley, #low pressure system, #weather
Transcript
Dogbert stands at the front of a room and says, "The secret to good relationships is to be a huge phony." Dilbert and Wally sit in the class. Dogbert clicks a remote control and says, "Let's practice the three fundamentals." A slide projection lists, "Loud, Simple, Smiley." Wally shouts, "Hey, how about that low-pressure system, huh?!!" Dogbert stands on a stool and says, "Again, but this time say 'weather.'"
Thursday January 09,
1997
Tags #mail order bride, #elbonian, #expectations low, #avoid disappointement, #powder snout, #pig lady
Transcript
Wally opens an air mail package. He thinks, "My Elbonian mail-order bride has arrived." Wally unties the package and thinks, "I must keep my expectations low to avoid any disappointment." A pig wearing a dress and a wig stands in the box. She says, "Where's the ladies sty? I desperately need to powder my snout."
Wednesday February 05,
1997
Tags #benefit of doubt, #haven't bothered, #laziness, #low performance rating, #many issues, #difficult
Transcript
The Boss says, "Alice, I gave you a low performance ranking because you haven't bothered me all year." The Boss explains, "Logically, if your job were difficult and important, you would have brought me many issues to resolve." Alice asks, "Can you think of ANY other reason I might not bring you issues?" The Boss replies, "Yeah, laziness. But I gave you the benefit of a doubt."
Thursday February 06,
1997
Tags #Catbert, #evil hr dircetor, #boss didn't see struggle, #low performance, #alice, #human resources binder, #downsize
Transcript
Alice sits across from Catbert's desk. She says, "I was so good at my job that I never needed to bother my boss, but he gave me a low rating because he didn't see me struggling." Catbert replies, "I must refer to my human resources binders to see how to deal with this." Catbert looks at a bookcase filled with binders. Most of the binders are labeled "Downsize" and a few are labeled "Hire Losers."
Thursday June 12,
1997
Tags #brought dilbert, #competitors product, #cover cost, #cup of coffee, #makes product special, #visiting the customer, #deceptive advertising
Transcript
Kenny and Dilbert sit at a conference table with a customer. Kenny tells the man, "I brought Dilbert to explain what makes our product special." Dilbert says, "It's exactly like our competitor's product except we charge more to cover the cost of our deceptive advertising." The man gets up and leaves the room. Dilbert says, "While you're up, could you get me a cup of coffee?" Kenny looks angry.
Monday October 20,
1997
Tags #baseball, #forgeries, #low investment, #moses, #sports memorabilia, #worth something, #autographs, #Sports
Transcript
Dilbert sits in an easy chair using his laptop computer. Dogbert stands on a side table and wags his tail. He says, "I'm going into the sports memorabilia business." Dogbert tosses a baseball in his hand and says, "I've heard that most autographs are forgeries, so my initial investment will be low." Dogbert says, "Can I interest you in a baseball signed by Moses?" Dilbert says, "Wow! That's going to be worth something."
Tuesday January 27,
1998
Tags #deputy of common sense, #four hour meeting, #behind schedule, #agenda, #morale is low
Transcript
During a staff meeting, Dogbert stands on the table holding his gun and says, "FREEZE!!" Dogbert is dressed as a policeman and says, "You scheduled a four-hour meeting to find out why people are behind schedule!" The guy says, "No, look at the agenda! The fourth hour is about why morale is so low. A woman next to him whispers to Dogbert, Shoot him."