Make Small Talk Comic Strips - Page 5
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1000 Results for Make Small Talk
View 41 - 50 results for make small talk comic strips. Discover the best "Make Small Talk" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday April 01,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #android, #kit, #walk, #talk, #dress, #differently, #Dogbert, #around
Transcript
Dilbert assembles an android and says to Dogbert, "I built this android from a kit." Dilbert continues, "He doesn't have a personality, but he will walk around and talk." Dogbert says, "Well, I hope you guys will at least dress differently."
Friday April 26,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #ufo, #warned, #talk, #circles, #leave, #wheat, #fields, #else, #Dogbert
Transcript
Dilbert's clothes look burned and smoke rises from his body. Dilbert says, "I was attacked by a UFO. They warned me not to talk about the circles they leave in wheat fields." The flying saucer returns and zaps Dilbert and Dogbert. Dilbert and Dogbert are both burned. Dilbert continues, "Then they said 'Or else.'"
Tuesday July 17,
2012
Tags #homes value, #make money, #schedules, #secretaries (office)
Transcript
Carol: You only do the things I put on your schedule. And if we consider recent declines in your home's value, I make more money than you do. Boss: What's your point? Carol: It's as if you work for me now.
Monday September 30,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #hover, #saucer, #complete, #destroy, #small, #country, #wrong, #hands
Transcript
Dilbert makes some adjustments to a vehicle that looks like a flying saucer. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "My hover-saucer invention is complete!" Dilbert continues, "It has enough advanced weaponry to destroy a small country." Dilbert says, "I hope it doesn't fall into the wrong hands." Dogbert thinks, "Paws."
Friday April 17,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #boss, #report, #reading, #anything, #sit, #feeling, #bottles, #beer, #wall
Transcript
Dilbert sits across from the Boss's desk thinking, "I sit here motionless while the Boss reads my report." Dilbert thinks, "I can't talk while he's reading, and I don't have anything of my own to read . . ." The Boss reads the report and thinks, "I wonder how long I can make him sit there feeling uncomfortable?" Dilbert sings to himself, "A hundred bottles of beer on the wall."
Friday May 15,
1992
Tags #Men, #combing, #ear, #hair, #bald, #spot, #head, #method, #talk
Transcript
A man says, "Hey, that's a good technique: combing your ear hair over the bald spot!" The man continues, "I've been working on the eyebrows-combed-over-the-head method." The man with the ear hair thinks, "Somebody should talk to that man."
Saturday July 18,
1992
Tags #computer, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #math, #talk, #doing, #circle, #pi, #jillion
Transcript
Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I spent my entire fortune to buy this supercomputer." Dogbert asks, "What does it do?" Dilbert replies, "It can calculate the value of pi to about a jillion decimal places . . ." Dilbert continues, "A lot of people TALK about the areas of circles, but I'm DOING something about it."
Saturday January 23,
1993
Tags #Dogbert, #romance, #interpreter, #logically, #solve, #emotional, #problems, #reasons, #fix, #hear, #wisdom, #compassion, #arouse, #talk, #himself, #dating, #women and men
Transcript
Dogbert, Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. Dilbert says, "Blah blah blah." Dogbert translates for the woman, "He's telling you how to logically solve all of the emotional problems you seem to have." Dilbert says, "Blah blah blah." Dogbert translates, "He reasons that if he can fix your problems he won't have to hear about them anymore." Dilbert says, "Blah blah me." Dogbert translates, "He hopes that the wisdom and compassion he just faked was enough to arouse you. Now he will talk about himself."
Tuesday March 02,
1993
Tags #Dilbert, #alice, #the boss, #Wally, #raises, #dependent, #evaluation, #co-workers, #hypothetically, #small, #available, #budget, #standards
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, Wally and Alice, "From now on, your raises will be partly dependent on an evaluation by your co-workers." Wally asks, "Hypothetically, if my co-workers got small raises then wouldn't there be more available in the budget for me?" Wally, Alice and Dilbert fall to the ground and fight. The Boss says, "That didn't last long, even by our standards."
Tuesday February 01,
1994
Tags #saint dogbert, #technology, #demons, #stupidity, #make command, #easy to remeber, #software developer
Transcript
Saint Dogbert seeks out technology that has been possessed by the demons of stupidity. He Happens across a software developer. Man: I'll make the command easier to remember like CTRL- ALT-F4-DEL" and if they forget that they can just edit the source code in command. com perfect Dogbert: out! out!