Medical Research Comic Strips - Page 5

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

243 Results for Medical Research

View 41 - 50 results for medical research comic strips. Discover the best "Medical Research" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #tainted research, #media, #clebrities, #blood, #environmental issues, #humor, #larry david, #hybrid car, #Entertainment

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert:"We need to get you on TV to publicize the tainted research I did." "The media likes celebrities, blood, environmental issues and humor." "Someone pushed a pointy-haired man in front of Larry David's car today."

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #stale dna, #ceo, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Our CEO says he wants to change the DNA of this company. Catbert: whats that mean? The Boss: I don't know, It sounds medical. Im frightened. The boos: Hold me. Catbert: Keep your stale DNA away from me.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dogberts ad agency, #research, #don't use prodcut, #outdoors, #indoors, #intensive ad campaign, #outdoors for losers, #humming birds, #man in garden, #happiness of gullible people, #science

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption: Dogbert's ad agency" Dogbert stands on a table holding a pointer. Dogbert says to The Boss and Dilbert, "According to my research..." Dogbert says, "...People don't use your products when they are outdoors." Dogbert gestures to The Boss, "Somehow we must keep people indoors." Dogbert flips a page on a display notepad. Dogbert says, "I recommend an intensive ad campaign..." Dogbert continues..."Featuring this slogan..." The pad reads, 'Outdoors is for losers.' Dpgbert says to Alice, Dilbert and The Boss, "The tv spot will show humming-birds attacking a man in his garden." Dilbert raises his hand and says, "Question: Wouldn't that destroy the happiness of gullible people?" Dogbert says, "We'll tell them it doesn't."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #medical procedure, #attractive to opposite sex, #remove body part, #sounds painful

View Transcript

Transcript

There's a medical procedure that will make you more attractive to the opposite sex. "The doctors would remove part of your body and replace them with the parts from an attractive guy." "It sounds painful." "Not if you do it all at once."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hired nancy, #lightening, #can't strike, #lighting strike, #invites problems, #medical school, #cadaver

View Transcript

Transcript

I hired Nancy because she's had so many personal problems in the past year. "I figure lightning can't strike the same place more than ten or twelve times in a row." "It's not as if she invites problems." "I'm in love with a medical school cadaver!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #serial personal problems, #in love, #medical school cadaver, #bad decisons, #acting cold, #boyfriend acting cold

View Transcript

Transcript

Nancy, the employee with serious personal problems Nancy: "I'm in love with a medical school cadaver." Alice: "Do you ever think that maybe your personal problems are caused by your own bad decisions?" Nancy: "How's it my fault that my boyfriend is acting cold?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #job opening, #research and development, #escape the mismanaged, #futility, #current job, #boss has similar idea

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: There's a job opening for an engineer in research and development!" "It's a chance to escape the mismanaged futility of my current job and live the dream!" The Boss: Hey, there's an opening for a new manager of research and development!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #prosperity, #intuition, #market research, #success rate, #binary choices, #tiny manager, #made of copper, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: From now on, I'm going to rely on my intuition instead of market research. Dilbert: If guessing can bring your success rate up to 50% for binary choices, I'm all for it. Hey, look! I found a tiny manager made of copper in my pocket!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office buildings, #cubicle workplace, #open floor plan, #research, #pattern, #randomize evil, #science

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We're thinking of moving from a cubicle workplace to an open floor plan. Dilbert: Is that because you did some research that discovered that the open floor plan is the only thing worse than what we have now? Boss: They figured out the pattern. Catbert: I told you we should randomize our evil!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meetings, #marketing plan, #consumers, #research is stupid, #opposed to science, #rational thinking, #manifestaions, #pendantic, #semantics, #stopped talking

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: ... and that's our marketing plan for the coming year. Dilbert: Research shows that consumers reject this sort of approach. Boss: Research is stupid. Dilbert: Are you saying the studies on this particular topic are flawed? Or are you just generally opposed to science, rational thinking, and all manifestations of common sense. Boss: Stop being pedantic with your semantics. Catbert: Did you get buy-in? Boss: Yes, in the sense that they stopped talking.