Next Award Comic Strips - Page 5

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

643 Results for Next Award

View 41 - 50 results for next award comic strips. Discover the best "Next Award" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #worthless awards, #famous people, #celebrities, #award ceremony, #become pretigious, #dogcart gullibility awards, #honor, #nominated

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert and Dilbert are on the couch, relaxing at home. Dogbert says: "I'm planning to give worthless awards to famous people." Dogbert continues: "If enough celebrities come to the award ceremony, it will become prestigious." Hair flying in the wind, a celebrity in his convertible speaks into his cell-phone: "I've never heard of the Dogbert Gullibility Award, but it's an honor to be nominated."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #me from future, #next holiday party, #never drank agina, #predicting future

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert introduces the future Dilbert to Alice: "Alice, this is me from the future." Alice says: "Hi." The future Dilbert tells Dilbert: "At the next holiday party, she's all over you." Dilbert asks the future Dilbert as they are walking away: "Is that true?" The future Dilbert answers: "No, but after today she never drank again."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #quit job, #next year, #extra week vacation, #every ten years

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice says to Dilbert as they walk, "I'd quit this job, but next year I'll get an extra week of vacation." Dilbert replies, "If you get an extra week for every ten years of services..." Dilbert continues, "...you'll be happy in 480 years. Good plan." Alice replies, not humored "Shut up."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #500 with tax, #complains about tax, #morale improvement award, #morale display

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says aloud, "The five hundred dollar morale improvement award goes to Ed." Shocked, Ed looks at the check and screams "Gaa!! It's only $240 after taxes!!!" Wally says to Dilbert, "So that's what good morale looks like." Dilbert replies, "Apparently we've had it the whole time."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #exceeding expectations, #padding objectives, #whistle blower, #award

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says, "As you know, I'm the only employee who is not exceeding expectations." Wally says, "You should punish the others for unscrupulously padding their objectives! Those lying weasels!!" Wally asks The Boss, "Can I get a Whistle-Blower Award for this?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #next generation, #internet project, #cute single women, #low standard

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally, sitting between the boss and Dilbert, says, "My next generation internet project is right on schedule." Wally says, "It'll be done sometime in the next generation." Wally continues, "If you know any cute single women with low standards, it would really help."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Wally, #clean desk award, #clutter free desk, #back to cubicle

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss hands Wally an award and says, "The Clean Desk award goes to Wally." As Wally looks at his award, The Boss continues, "Maybe Wally can share some tips on keeping our desks clutter-free." Wally looks up and responds, "I usually throw away this sort of thing in the men's room on the way back to my cubicle."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #prestigious award, #attendance, #typo, #obsecenity, #name spelled wrong

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok is sitting at his computer. Carol hands him an award and says, "Asok, you are the winner of a prestigious award for attendance." Asok replies, "My name is misspelled.. As an obscenity." Carol says, "Typo." Asok exclaims, "Typo? You added four letters!!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #reserve conference room, #everyday, #next year, #sociopath, #beat you to it, #slowest sociopath

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss approaches Carol at her desk and says, "Carol, reserve the conference room every day for the next day in case I need it." Carol responds, "You're too late. Some other sociopath had the same idea and beat you to it." As The Boss walks away he thinks to himself, "I hate being the slowest sociopath."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #next speaker, #athlete, #drugs, #booze, #inspirational

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says into a microphone, "Our next speaker was a famous athlete until drugs and booze ruined his life." A shaky, disheveled man walks towards The Boss and says, "Shank Hew Vewy Mush." Alice turns to The Boss and says, "It's not inspirational until he stops doing those things." The Boss asks, "What?"