Pile Of Poop Comic Strips - Page 5

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

61 Results for Pile Of Poop

View 41 - 50 results for pile of poop comic strips. Discover the best "Pile Of Poop" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 31, 2001's comic on:


Tags #outsourced sales, #elbonian company, #complex technology, #bad string, #call back, #mud pile

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "We outsourced our sales and fulfillment functions to an Elbonian company." Wally looks at Dilbert as Dilbert asks, "Um... Are you sure that's the best way to sell complex technology?" Three Elbonians and a pig each are holding a tin can with string to their ears. One Elbonian says, "Could you call back? We have a bad string."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 01, 2001's comic on:


Tags #elboninan fullfillment, #service, #thwart, #300 times, #string phones, #mud pile, #pig, #laughing, #animals

View Transcript

Transcript

Two Elbonians each have a tin can with string held up to their ears. One Elbonian says, "This is the Elbonian Fulfillment Service. How may I thwart you?" The Elbonians continue listening to their tin cans. One Elbonian hears, "Grunt grunt grunt grunt grunt." The Elbonian holds his tin can away from his ear and says to the pig, "Okay, it wasn't funny the first 300 times either."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 28, 2002's comic on:


Tags #quitting, #work for myslef, #deal with morons, #freelance webdesigner

View Transcript

Transcript

An employee comes into The Boss' office and says, "Ha ha! I quit you stinkin' pile of rubbish!" The employee continues, "I'm going to work for myself. I won't need to deal with morons like you again!" The employee calms down and adds, "On an unrelated note, if you need a freelance web designer, please call me."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 05, 2003's comic on:


Tags #too busy, #bottleneck, #document, #desk, #office

View Transcript

Transcript

"I can't do any more work on my project until you give your input, but you're too busy." "There's no polite way to say this: Bill, you're a bottleneck." "Your document is now saying hi to the bottom of the pile."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 03, 2004's comic on:


Tags #ytransferred, #new job, #secretary job eliminated, #masive incompetence, #resentment, #anger, #splitting mad, #offers new job

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "Carol, two things: First, I got transferred to a new job, and that means your job here is eliminated." Carol: "Why must I suffer for your massive incompetence? You worthless pile of stinking crud!" "And the second thing?" The boss: "I'll need a secretary at the new job."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 06, 1999's comic on:


Tags #email two copies, #fax, #green paper, #email, #files, #hard copy, #internet, #motivation gone, #losing consciousness, #lazy employees, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands at the boss' desk. The boss says, "e-mail two copies to me when you're done." Dilbert says, "Two copies? It's e0mail." The boss says, "So?" Dilbert says, "Never mind. I'll e-mail two copies." The boss says, "and fax a copy in green paper for my files." Dilbert says, "Green? It's a fax!" The boss walks Dilbert out of his office and says, "And bring me a hard copy of the internet so I can do some serious surfing." Dilbert begins to faint in the doorway. Dilbert thinks, "Motivation.... gonve.. losing consciousness.." Dilber joins the pile of passed out employess by the boss' door. The boss thinks, "How did I end up with all the lazy employees?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 05, 2007's comic on:


View Transcript

Transcript

Have you signed Ted's get well card yet? "Don't leave that here. Ted passed away two weeks ago. How long have you had the card on your desk?" "Have you signed Ted's get well card yet?" "Put it on the pile."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 06, 2013's comic on:


Tags #complaining, #team members, #work, #motivation, #make waves

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I can't get one of my team members to do any work. I'm hoping you can talk to his boss. Boss: I don't want to make waves. Dilbert: It's your job to make waves! They pay you to make waves, you worthless pile of stupidity! Oops. Wally: I heard you made waves. How'd that work out? Dilbert: Surprisingly bad.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 19, 2008's comic on:


Tags #hands to boss, #insensitive, #plop, #toss, #worked all night, #disregard, #overlooked

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I worked all night to finish the assignments on time. The Boss: Toss it on the pile. Dilbert: I'd feel better if you used a different choice of words." The Boss: Plop it on the top.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 20, 2009's comic on:


Tags #title, #janitor, #proud, #happy, #ridiculous

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the CEO Dogbert says, "Floyd, I'm giving you a c-level title." Dogbert says, "You'll be the chief janitorial officer, in charge of all dirt, germs, dead critters and problematic excretions." Man says, "Is it because I'm so important?" Dogbert says, "What answer would make you clean up poop faster?"