Search Results for "public relations"
Share October 27, 2011's comic on:
CEO: I will prove our industrial sludge is safe by forcing an intern to drink a glass of it. Voice: That's stupid. We want to see you drink it yourself. CEO: See if you can reach that guy in the second row with a spit take.
Share December 07, 2011's comic on:
Dilbert: And that's my last slide, any comments? Woman: You stole an hour of my life, something inside me died. I will never have another good day. Dilbert: I went in with low expectations. Wally: They can't hurt you if you're already dead.
Share February 25, 2012's comic on:
Dilbert: My PowerPoint slides have a little something for everyone. For my intelligent viewers, I have data, and for the morons, I have manipulative anecdotes. Which reminds me-- did you hear about the boss who died because he didn't praise his employee?
Share April 01, 2012's comic on:
Dogbert: You need to imbue your staff with a sense of urgency. Boss: Gaaa!!! Our technology platforms are obsolete! Dogbert: Try it again with less panic. Boss: We're doomed, and yet, I am not the least bit worried. Dogbert: That one had a creepy vibe. A sense of urgency is halfway between being too frightened to act and too dumb to know what to do. Boss: Gaaa!!! Duh!!! Dogbert: You didn't quite thread the needle. Boss: Here comes leadership!
Share May 15, 2012's comic on:
Dilbert: Do you want me to put the chart on one page, which would make the text too small for you to see? Or do you prefer a multiple-page approach that is confusing and unpersuasive? Boss: It's probably better if no one can read it. Dilbert: I won't bother using real words.
Share February 13, 1990's comic on:
Dilbert: ...so to do our part for east-west relations... I've decided to host a dog from the soviet exchange program. Dogbert: What? Dilbert: Dogbert, I'd like you to meet Nikita Nikita Dorgachev. Dogbert: Charmed.
Share October 10, 1990's comic on:
Dilbert and Dogbert sit on a park bench. Dilbert says, "Ugh . . . Look at that young couple kissing in public." Dilbert continues, "They should realize how impolite it is." Dogbert asks, "Is it impolite for us to stare at them?" Dilbert replies, "We're just the victims in all this, Dogbert."
Share March 01, 1991's comic on:
Dilbert reads the newspaper and says, "The tiny nation of Elbonia has been reclassified from a third-world country to a second-world country." Dogbert asks, "Second?" Dilbert explains, "That means they have plenty to eat, but they don't like it." In Elbonia, an Elbonian mother puts a tray of food on the table. Her child says, "Airline food, again?!"
Share May 27, 1992's comic on:
A short man wearing an Indian pancha says to two women in a bar, "Hello, ladies." The man says, "I'm Wilt Ghandi. I'm the product of a genetic experiment combining the wisdom of Wilt Chamberlain and the body of Ghandi." One woman says, "That's the best line tonight. I'm going for it." The other woman says, "Hey, I saw him first."