Quality Of Paper Comic Strips - Page 5
471 Results for Quality Of Paper
View 41 - 50 results for quality of paper comic strips. Discover the best "Quality Of Paper" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share April 10, 1995's comic on:
A co-worker shows Dilbert and Wally a keyboard. The co-worker says, "This ergonomic keyboard is our fist product developed under the 'Big Q' program." The man continues, "The 'Q' stands for quality." Dilbert says, "Speaking of Q . . . it's missing the letter Q." The man says angrily, "You sound just like our whiny customers." Dilbert says, I guess the 'Q' stands for 'uality.'"
Share May 25, 1995's comic on:
Dogbert sits in Dilbert's office with a laptop balanced on his lap. He says to Dilbert, "Tell me your greatest accomplishments at work. I'll use that to hype you up with your boss so you get a big raise." Dilbert says, "I wrote a draft of a white paper on a strawman process to reengineer our product process." Dogbert asks, "And what was the impact of that work?" Dilbert answers, I think some owls lost their woodland habitats."
Share June 08, 1995's comic on:
Dogbert, Dilbert, Alice, Wally and the Boss sit at a round table. Dogbert says, "In this team-building exercise you will make paper dolls while blindfolded." Dogbert continues, "This may seem absurd. But soon, cognitive dissonance will set in and you'll cry and hug and think you learned something." The members of the group, now blindfolded and working with scissors, begin their work. As he is about to cut his hand with the scissors, Dilbert asks, "Are you sure we'll cry and hug?" Dogbert answers, "Actually, hugging is iffy."
Share July 19, 1995's comic on:
At lunch, Dilbert says to Wally, "I don't know what kind of gift to buy for Ted's baby shower." Wally responds, "Hand-crafted items are good. Cut three holes in a paper bag and you've got a lovely baby dress." Dilbert says, "He might think I'm cheap." Wally holds up the table's salt shaker and asks, "Do you think the kid has a salt shaker yet?"
Share July 20, 1995's comic on:
Ted is at his baby shower with Dilbert, Alice and Wally. He has just opened a present and says, "Oh look, it's a stapler . . ." Ted continues, "I can use this to take up the hem on the lovely handcrafted paper bag dress that Dilbert made." Looking at the stapler, Ted comments, "It looks just like the one that disappeared from my cubicle this morning." Wally says, "Except yours had staples."
Share August 17, 1995's comic on:
The Boss is surprised to see Ratbert hanging in midair. Ratbert says, "Don't be alarmed. I'm not really a rat floating in midair." Ratbert continues, "I'm clinging to the back of an employee who has been rendered invisible by a long succession of worthless assignments." The Boss comments, "Looks like an isolated case of bad attitude." Behind the Boss, a beaver is suspended in midair. The beaver asks, "Which room is the 'quality' meeting in?"
Share September 13, 1995's comic on:
Wally stands behind Dilbert's desk. Dilbert says, "I'm writing an e-mail to protest the new policy of making the employees empty their own trash at night." Dilbert continues, "It's stupid to have highly paid engineers doing unproductive tasks when we could be inventing the future!" Wally asks, "Are you coming to the 'Quality Faire?'" Dilbert answers, "No, this will take another hour."
Share September 14, 1995's comic on:
Dilbert is standing in front of the copying machine. Reaching inside the copier, a man says, "Here's the problem. We've got a whole nest of paper trolls." The man yells as he is being pulled into the machine, "AAIIEE!" Dilbert thinks, "If I call 911 now I'll never know if the lower paper tray would have worked."
Share December 21, 1995's comic on:
Dogbert stands at Dilbert's desk working on the computer and Dilbert sits next to him. Dilbert says, "It isn't ethical to hack into the payroll computer and give me a raise, Dogbert." Dogbert replies, "Not ethical?? Is it ethical for them to make you work seventy hours a week and only pay you for forty??!!" Dilbert asks, "How about a five percent raise?" Dogbert replies, "Well, there is the issue of the quality of your work . . ."
Share July 15, 1990's comic on:
Dilbert sits at a banquet table with three other people. The Boss stands at the podium and says, "Thank you all for coming to Irv Klepfurd's retirement celebration." The Boss continues, "Many of you know that Irv has been pilfering office supplies for his entire career." The Boss continues, "In fact, he's only retiring now because he finished construction on his garage made entirely of paper clips." The Boss continues, "This bill is for $87,000 of personal phone calls made from the office." The Boss continues, "Instead of a gold watch, I'm going to write the current time on this yellow sticky pad and slap it on his forehead." The Boss slaps Irv. The Boss continues, "Now . . . I understand we have some birthdays today . . ."