Threat Comic Strips - Page 5

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53 Results for Threat

View 41 - 50 results for threat comic strips. Discover the best "Threat" comics from Dilbert.com.

Robot Will Crush Employees

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Robot Will Crush Employees  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags robot, boss, manager, threat, artificial intelligence, control, power

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Robot: Thanks to advances in artificial intelligence, I am both a robot and your new boss. Work hard while I do nothing or I will crush each of your skulls with my mechanical arms. Dilbert: He's tough, but he's fair. Wally: And no micromanaging. I find it refreshing.

Elon Musk Warns The World

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 Elon Musk Warns The World - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technology, artificial intelligence, ai, social media, distraction, thinking, thought

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Robot: Elon Musk is warning the world that A.I. could be a threat to humankind. Dilbert: We humans won't go without a fight! Robot: Look at this viral video on social media. Dilbert: Hee hee! What were we talking about before? Robot: You were mistakenly believing you haven't already lost the war.

Wally Maintains The Network

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Wally Maintains The Network  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags information, spying, surviellance, blackmail, extortion

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Boss: Wally, your performance is terrible. You're fired. Wally: Are you aware that every message you have ever sent using company devices is archived on a network you assigned me to maintain? Boss: Is that a threat? Wally: I also archive your web searches.

Disgruntled Carol

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Disgruntled Carol - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags personality test, personality, mental illness, fear, threat, danger, psychology

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Boss: Did you take The Dogbert Personality Type Test? Carol: Yes. I'm a disgruntled psychopath with a blinding hatred for authority. Boss: I'll be in my office. Carol: Good! Stay there!

Boss Loves Criticism

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Boss Loves Criticism - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags mentor, mentee, protege, Advice, competition, deception

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Alice The Mentor. Alice: One thing I can tell you about our boss is that he loves constructive criticism. Man: I feel as if your advice is intended to make me fail because you see me as a threat to take your job. Alice: And he loves it when you grab him by the hair and yell, "handles!"

Porch Thief Is Neutralized

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Porch Thief Is Neutralized  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags violence, retaliation, delivery, package, stealing, theft, ring, technology

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Alice: Uh-oh. My home security system is showing a thief stealing a package from my front door. Activating particle beam defense. The threat has been neutralized. Dilbert: When you say "neutralized," does that mean... Alice: Activating crime scene cleanup drone.

Elbonian Ninjas

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Elbonian Ninjas - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags controversy, offense, offensive, threat, murder, ninja, optimism

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Boss: The sales video you made for our Elbonian market is causing a public relations crisis. Their government has ordered Elbonian ninjas to kill you in your sleep. Dilbert: In my sleep? The best way to die! Boss: Stop confusing my bad news with your good news.

Jerry The Contract Employee

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Jerry The Contract Employee - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags threat, Dilbert, the boss, jerry, contract, zebra, agile

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The Boss: This is Jerry the contract employee. I hired him to work on project zebra. Dilbert: We haven't even defined the project. How did you know what skills we needed? The Boss: Why are you so threatened by jerry? Jerry: He's not very agile.

Workplace Bully

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Workplace Bully - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boss, bully, managers & supervisors, office workers, threat, work

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Boss: Cheryl, the other employees are complaining that you're a workplace bully. Cheryl: Hand over your wallet or else I'll tell your boss you tried to give me a shoulder rub. Carol: Did you talk to her? Boss: Don't ever ask me to do anything for your again.

Alice Gets Mandatory Training

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Alice Gets Mandatory Training - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags complaining, office workers, punishment, threat

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Alice: I can't work with old Ned. He's a sexist, racist, bigoted troglodyte. Catbert: Name-calling is not allowed in this company. I sentence you to three weeks of mandatory training. Alice: I could trangle you with your own tail. Catbert: Six weeks!