Trust And Stupidity Comic Strips - Page 5

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161 Results for Trust And Stupidity

View 41 - 50 results for trust and stupidity comic strips. Discover the best "Trust And Stupidity" comics from Dilbert.com.

The Candy Honor System

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The Candy Honor System - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags candy, irritation, office workers, steal, stealing food, office, trust

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Carol: I put a candy bowl on my desk, and someone stole the entire bowl within five minutes. I'm old enough to remember when the honor system meant something. What happened to trust? Boss: Maybe the candy wasn't as good back then.

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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Tweaking Variables

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Tweaking Variables - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, office, office workers, strategy, stupidity

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Dilbert: I can't get my five-year projections to match what you told the board. Boss: Try tweaking the variables until they do. Dilbert: That would make me a liar. Boss: Nah. In five years it will look like ordinary stupidity.

Dark Matter Identified

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Dark Matter Identified - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags philosophy, stupidity, dark, matter, universe, abundant, obvious

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dilbert: they say 85% of the matter in the universe is dark matter, and we don't even know what that is. dogbert: well, if it's the most abundant thing in the universe, it has to be made of stupidity. dilbert: why wasn't that obvious to me? dogbert: because you're 85% dark matter

Trial Postponed

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Trial Postponed - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, trial, court, stupidity, judge, dare, lawyer, postponed

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dogbert: your trial at the court of stupidity has been postponed. the judge is suffering from a gavel-related injury. dilbert: did you attack him with a gavel? dogbert: didn't need to. the man can't say no to a dare.

Just Like Marketing

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Just Like Marketing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, marketing, project, managers, stupidity, transfer, extinguished, divinity

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boss: how's your project going? dilbert: it was doing fine until a thick wave of stupidity swept over it and extinguished my spark of divinity. i don't know what will become of me. boss: i'll transfer you to marketing. they're all like that.

Buy An Adapter

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Buy An Adapter - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags sarcasm, stupidity, technology, Dilbert, business, network, adapter

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dilbert: the hardware you ordered is not compatible with our network. boss: just buy an adapter. dilbert: i don't think anyone makes an adapter that can fix stupidity.

Dogbert In The Cloud

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Dogbert In The Cloud - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, personal, information, cloud, safe, worry, trust, manage, system, browser, history

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boss: i'm concerned that storing my personal information in the cloud is not safe. dilbert: don't be such a worrier. i'm sure we can trust the people who manage those systems to keep us safe. somewhere in the cloud dogbert: hee-hee! look at the browser history on this bunion-having loser.

Betting On Management

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Betting On Management - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags covid-19, business, technology, confidence, management, infection, coronavirus, bet, stupidity, income, betting, health

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dilbert: does it reduce your confidence in our management that 100% of them got infected with coronavirus. wally: all i know is that i won $300 betting it would happen. dilbert: how often do you bet on their stupidity? wally: often enough to double my income.

Sarcasm Or Stupidity

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Sarcasm Or Stupidity - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, suggestion, idea, dumb, sarcasm, stupidity, good, questions

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dilbert: was your suggestion meant to be sarcasm, or are you so dumb you think it is a good idea? co-worker: i think it's a good idea. dilbert: i have no further questions.

Anonymous Sources

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Anonymous Sources - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, sarcasm, technology, company, anonymous, credibility, trust, lie, thief, sources

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boss: anonymous sources tell me you have been stealing from the company. dilbert: anonymous sources have no credibility. boss: that's exactly what they told me you'd say. dilbert: why do you trust them over me? boss: well, for one thing, i hear you're a thief. dilbert: you heard that from the anonymous sources that have no credibility! boss: why would they lie to me? dilbert: same reason you lie to me. boss: okay, that makes sense.