Unspoken Rules Comic Strips - Page 5
52 Results for Unspoken Rules
View 41 - 50 results for unspoken rules comic strips. Discover the best "Unspoken Rules" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share January 31, 2010's comic on:
Coworker says, "Wally, will you do me a favor?" Wally says, "Absolutely. What are friends for?" Wally says, "After all, you'd do a favor for me if I asked, right?" Coworker says, "Um? sure." Wally says, "Of course you would." Wally says, "So do me a favor and don't ask me to do any favors." Coworker says, "Wow. Okay. I did not see that coming." Asok says, "You're like a wizard who uses the rules of social convention as if they are magic." Asok says, "You're Hairless Potter!" Wally says, "Don't tell Baldemort."
Share December 10, 2000's comic on:
Noriko says to Dilbert, "And we'll have sub-second response time. Dilbert says to Noriko, "Actually, it's already two seconds, and your change will add two more." Noriko exclaims to Dilbert, "Why do you always have to be right?!" Noriko says to Dilbert, "Just once can't you admit I'm right?" Dilbert says, "Okay, I admit that two plus two equals less than one." Noriko says, "I don't mean now, jerk. I mean in general." Dilbert says, "Okay. In general I admit that the rules of physics are optional." Noriko exclaims, "You're doing it wrong!!" Dilbert says, "You're right. My fault again."
Share December 06, 2014's comic on:
Dilbert: Your rule is that no more than eight people should attend a meeting, so I can't let you sit down. CEO: When did I say that? Dilbert: It was in a book you co-wrote. CEO: I knew I should have skimmed that thing. Dilbert: Your unknown co-author is quite wise.
Share December 14, 2015's comic on:
The Sales Call. Salesman: If you need any tweaks to the software, Dilbert can do that in minutes. Dilbert: I'm not allowed to tweak the software for one customer. Salesman: He'll do it anyway. Dilbert: I'm going to report you.
Share February 19, 2016's comic on:
Dilbert: Can you give me Carol's home address? I agreed to watch her kids and she turned off her phone for her date night. Catbert: It is against company policy for me to use my good judgment to save children. Dilbert: Are you sure it says that? Catbert: Yes. I wrote it myself.
Share March 14, 2017's comic on:
Dilbert: Our policy says I can't take my vacation until I complete all of my mandatory training. I can't take the fax safety class because it no longer exists. Can you make a policy exception for me? Boss: Okay, I won't force you to take a vacation.
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Share August 26, 2019's comic on:
Boss: Dilbert, I want you to plan the team-building celebration. Make sure there is no alcohol, no dancing, no touching, no flirting, and no joking around. Dilbert: Can we eat? Boss: Only food that has never been near a peanut.
Share January 03, 2020's comic on:
catbert: it might my imagination, but it looks as if all of our employees are incompetent. boss: we need to create a tangle of bureaucratic rules that make it impossible for them to get anything done. catbert: you want to use inefficiency to protect us against incompetence? boss: yin and yang.