Wildly Successful Comic Strips - Page 5

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

58 Results for Wildly Successful

View 41 - 50 results for wildly successful comic strips. Discover the best "Wildly Successful" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

I'm going to start a high tech company in the garage. "Some of the most successful companies started in garages. It must help somehow." "I wonder if those other guys had homeowner rules about not parking in the driveway."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #guilt, #excuse, #lie, #work, #avoiding, #acting

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says, "The successful work - avoider combines a fake eagerness to help with just a hint of likely failure." Man says, "Wally, I need load calcs in an hour." Wally says, "No problem! Unless my computer keeps crashing like it did all morning." Man says, "I'll ask someone else." Wally says, "I am begging you to let me help!" Asok thinks, "Wow!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #change, #communicate, #clear, #moron, #mock, #tease, #fuh, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "A successful transformation requires employees to feel ownership for the change." Alice says, "Change? What change?" Dilbert says, "Is there something we don't know?" The Boss says, "It's important that everyone has clear roles and responsibilities." Alice says, "What are you trying to tell us? Should we stop working on our projects?" The Boss says, "I'll keep you engaged and energized with my clear communication." The Boss says, "And as your leader, I will role-model the desired change." Alice says, "If he's our role model, I guess we need to act like morons who can't communicate." The Boss thinks, "I need new people." FUH FUH FUH FUH FUH FUH

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"How was your conference call?" "Very successful. Bill said he'd find a new supplier for the casing." "Or it might have been Ron, Ted, or Bob. They all sound the same on the phone." "I hope it wasn't Bill. He never follows through." "Ron is too overworked, Ted is a liar and Bob's a moron." "I'd say the call was a waste of time. It might even be a huge step backward." "Success is the happy feeling you get between the time you do something and the time you tell a woman what you did."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #conversation, #honesty, #serial idiot, #startup idea, #business idea

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: ...and that's my idea for a start-up. What do you think? Dogbert: I'm not a big fan of other people being successful, so I'll say the idea is terrible. Dilbert: Remind me why I talk to you. Dogbert: You're a serial entreprenidiot.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #executives, #networking, #key to success, #avoid contact, #with losers, #send off, #security

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I'm reading a book that says the key to success is networking with successful people. CEO: Did you get to the chapter where it says successful people should avoid all contact with losers? Asok: It seems we have a standoff. CEO: Security.

Dilbert Invents Tube Clothes

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Invents Tube Clothes - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #clothing, #decision, #decision-making, #inventions, #success, #thinking, #tube clothes, #eliminate decisions, #mark zuckerberg, #gray t-short, #success secrets

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I call my invention "tube clothes." The idea is to eliminate as many daily decisions as possible, the way Mark Zuckerberg does with his gray t-shirt. I like to understand what makes people successful. Dogbert: And you narrowed it down to his shirt?

Success Is About Who You Know

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Success Is About Who You Know - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #blame, #blaming, #success, #who you know

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Success is all about who you know. I'm not successful, so apparently it doesn't help to know you. Dilbert: I"m sorry I let you down. Wally: It's as if you aren't even trying.

It Takes More Than Luck

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
It Takes More Than Luck - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #success, #intelligence, #privilege, #nepotism, #obliviousness, #confusion

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: Asok, it takes more than luck to be successful. You also have to be smart. Asok: How did you select your level of intelligence before birth? CEO: I don't understand the question. Asok: Now I am getting mixed messages.

Dilbert Is Picked As Company Mascot`

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Is Picked As Company Mascot` - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #posture, #mascot, #success, #hunchback, #work ethic, #reward

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: Management has selected Dilbert to be our new company mascot. His bad posture speaks volumes about his hard work and long hours. Dilbert: Ow! CEO: Did you ever dream you would be so successful? Dilbert: This is exactly how I dreamed it.