Won By Default Comic Strips - Page 5

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45 Results for Won By Default

View 41 - 45 results for won by default comic strips. Discover the best "Won By Default" comics from Dilbert.com.

Winning Design Awards

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Winning Design Awards - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 27, 2017's comic on:


Tags #design, #fragile, #cell phone, #crack, #screen, #evil, #technology

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Boss: 100 percent of our smartphone buyers dropped and broke their phones within one minute of unboxing them. Despite our slippery materials and brittle design, customers blamed themselves. And we won seven prestigious design awards. CEO: Yes!

Intentionally Underbidding

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Intentionally Underbidding - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 30, 2018's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #intentionally, #underbidding, #extra-shoddy, #work, #grossly, #overcharging, #upgrades, #criminal, #organization, #proven

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The Boss: We won the job by intentionally underbidding. But we can close the profit gap by doing extra-shoddy work and grossly overcharging for upgrades. Dilbert: Are we a criminal organization? The Boss: Not in a way that can easily be proven.

Winning The Nasa Contract

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Winning The Nasa Contract - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 20, 2018's comic on:


Tags #aliens, #attack, #communication, #earth, #space, #nasa

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Boss: NASA has detected an alien probe heading for earth. We won the NASA contract to contact the aliens using a focused laser beam. Dilbert: Wouldn't that look to them like an attack? Boss: Maybe that's why do one else bid.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 10, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business ethics, #engineering, #government, #idea, #managers & supervisors, #math, #ocean, #research, #sarcasm, #science, #temperature, #tests

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Boss: We won a government contract to measure ocean temperatures. Dilbert: Which part of the ocean? Boss: The whole ocean. Dilbert: We can't put sensors everywhere in the ocean. It's too big. Boss: We can measure a bunch of places and estimate the rest. Dilbert: So...you want me to measure 1% of the ocean's temperature and estimate the other 99%? I don't know how to do that. Boss: Try using math. Dilbert: Wouldn't it be cheaper to measure nothing and just estimate the whole thing? Boss: Every now and then you come up with a great idea.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 12, 2019's comic on:


Tags #bugs, #business, #fire, #office, #office workers, #quit, #system

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ceo: ned won 't return any of my messages. ceo: fire him the boss: i can't do that. the boss holding hands out: ned is indispensable. ceo: what makes him indispensable? the boss: he's the only one who knows how to fix bugs in our system. ceo: what system? the boss: i don't know. ceo: then how do you know he's indispensable? the boss: ned told me. ceo: fire him anyway. dilbert: ned quit two years ago.