Search Results for "years"
Share September 30, 2002's comic on:
The Boss says to Dilbert, "Dilbert, I want you to integrate our sales database with our inventory and finance systems." The Boss continues, "The managers of those systems are a nitwit, an ogre, and a $#!&% respectively." The Boss continues, "And they know that two of them will be fired when it's complete." Dilbert responds, "I can get that done in thirty years."
Share October 17, 2002's comic on:
Dilbert is sitting at his computer. A coworker approaches and says, "Can you come to the product-launch party next week?" Dilbert responds, "No. I'll be working day and night for five years to build the product you think you're launching." The coworker says, "Something tells me you don't add much to a party." Dilbert responds, "You haven't seen my mime impression."
Share January 03, 2003's comic on:
Carol approaches The Boss and says, "A reporter wants to see you." Carol continues, "He claims we've been delivering all of our garbage to the local park for twenty years." Carol asks, "How is that even possible?" The Boss replies, "The secret is in the spreading."
Share July 11, 2003's comic on:
Headline: A Few Years Ago. Catbert says, "The company will no longer provide free soft drinks." Headline: This Year. Catberrt says, "No more free coffee, and no more free bottled water." Headline: In the Future. Catbert is in a space suit. He says, "Don't swallow your saliva."
Share August 11, 2003's comic on:
Share September 17, 2004's comic on:
Carol: Something's been bugging me. Carol: Ive been an executive assistant for five years. when do I get promoted to executive? Ive got leadership coming out of my ears! The boss: Thats wax.
Share March 03, 2006's comic on:
Bob will be leaving us after 17 years as vice president of marketing. "Bob's accomplishments include lowering both our margins and our sales while overseeing a series of confusing marketing campaigns." "I hope you'll all join me in wishing for a piano to fall on his head."
Share February 06, 2007's comic on:
The Boss: Congratulations on 20 years of service. Here's a pen with the company's logo. "I have one just like it. At least I think this one is mine. I might have gotten them mixed up." "Which one looks like it spent the least time in my ear?"
Share December 18, 2012's comic on:
Boss: I need a second opinion on a job applicant. His name is J.B. Hopper. He dresses in a bunny costume and he's had seventeen jobs in two years. Catbert: Are there any red flags? Boss: I can't tell if he's passionate or if he has rage issues.