Company Comic Strips - Page 50

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

882 Results for Company

View 491 - 500 results for company comic strips. Discover the best "Company" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags marketing plan, annihilation, life on earth, serious competitor, tobacco, junk food, quarterly review

View Transcript

Transcript

Marketing Lady: My marketing plan calls for the annihilation of all life on earth. Our only serious competitor is a company that sells tobacco and junk food. Id like volunteers. Asok: I beed some accomplishments for my quarterly review.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags company concierge, diet an dexercise, doctor appointment, sleeping at desk, want pills

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Ratbert the Concierge, "I don't have time for my doctor appointment." The Boss continues, "Go in my place and tell him you're having trouble sleeping at your desk." The Boss says, "And don't let him sweet-talk you about diet and exercise. I want pills.!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags company concierge, alibi, lye, a barrel, police, break you, legal

View Transcript

Transcript

An employee says to Ratbert the Concierge, "I need an alibi." The employee continues, "The police will try to beat the truth out of you, but don't let them break you!" The employee goes on, "I also need lye...and a barrel...better yet, make that two barrels."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags no respect, work, send resume, located

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to Dogbert before leaving for work, "I'm tired of getting no respect at work." Dilbert continues, "I'm going to send my resume to a company that's locted in a place I'd never want to live." Dogbert says to Dilbert while reading the paper, "I wonder why they don't respect you." Dilbert answers angrily, "That's what I want to know!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags poach employees, leave comapny, wink wink, moron

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Dilbert, "I'm not allowed to poach employees if I leave this company." The Boss continues as he winks at Dilbert, "But there's no law against you asking me for a job...wink...wink." The Boss begins yelling, "I'm not going to wink all day you moron!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technical certificate, new power, better job, different comaony, hired you

View Transcript

Transcript

An employee says to the Boss, "Ha Ha! You never should have let me get a technical certification." The employee continues to explain, "I used my new power to get a better job at a different company." The Boss replies, "Tell me again why I hired you?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags forty million dollars, needs approval, over budget, whose side?

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert holds out a slip of paper to his Boss and says, "This needs your approval." The Boss looks at the piece of paper and Dilbert continues, "The company will save forty million dollars but you'll be ten thousand over budget." Dilbert says, "And before you ask, no it won't work the other way around." The Boss says, "Whose side are you on?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags 30 day dance of death, new job within, spray paint

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert, standing on a table, says to Ted, "Ted, your thirty-day dance of death begins today." Shaking a bottle of spray-paint, Catbert says, "You must find a new job within the company during that time." As Catbert spray-paints the letter 'L' on Ted's chest, Ted says, "Is the spray-paint absolutely necessary?" Catbert says, "That's an 'L'."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags begging for job, boss, callous, mean, office

View Transcript

Transcript

Ted, who has the letter 'E' painted on his chest, says to The Boss, "Catbert says I have to get a new job within the company." Ted says, "Could you find it within your heart..." The Boss, reaching for a heart on his desk, says, "I'll check." Ted watches as The Boss looks at the heart. The Boss says, "Nope. No jobs in there."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags beef eating, just stress, mandatory cpr, middle aged men, training for emplyees, pear shaped

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert says to Dilbert and Asok the Intern, "The company will be holding mandatory CPR training for all employees." Asok says, "GAA!!" The Boss looks on as Asok says to Catbert, "I am surrounded by pear-shaped, beef-eating, middle-aged men who I prefer not to touch." Catbert and The Boss look on as Asok rubs his chest and says, "Uh-oh... I hope that's just stress."