Less Appealing Name Comic Strips - Page 50

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

572 Results for Less Appealing Name

View 491 - 500 results for less appealing name comic strips. Discover the best "Less Appealing Name" comics from Dilbert.com.

Dilbert Is Barely Trying

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Is Barely Trying - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #jobs, #progress, #problems, #expectations

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: I've notice that you go to work every day and yet the world is still a boiling cesspool of terribleness. It's as if you're not even trying. Dilbert: I gotta go. I'm late for doing nothing useful. Dogbert: I'm already forgetting your name.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #correction, #correcting, #freak out, #anger, #tress, #Advice, #eavesdropping, #awkward, #temper

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: What's the best way to invest these days? Boss: Penny stocks are the best value because they only cost a penny. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! I hate over hearing bad advice! Boss: If I were you, I"d take out a second mortgage and load up. Dilbert; I don't want to get involved, but I'll feel bad if I don't. Boss: You'll get reliable stock-picking advice from strangers on television. Dilbert: Run! Cover your ears and run! If it makes you feel any less awkward, I don't now what to do now, either.

Gawful Media Company

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Gawful Media Company - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #merger, #acquisition, #gawker, #morals, #executives, #decision, #information

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: The board is proud to announce that we will be acquiring the Gawful Media Company. Dilbert: Are you aware that Gawful is so despicable that a crime bill has their name on it? CEO: Hey, don't blame me. I told the board that someone should Google them.

Men Who Do The Driving

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Men Who Do The Driving - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dating, #driving, #Men, #conversation, #relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Woman: I like a man who always offers to do the driving on dates? Dilbert: Like Uber? Woman: But less expensive, and no waiting. Dilbert; So you're saying I'm better than Uber? Woman: You would be if you didn't talk.

Topper Signs Document

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Topper Signs Document - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #one-up, #best, #competition, #deception, #trick, #signature

View Transcript

Transcript

Topper. Dilbert: I once signed my entire first name to a document. Topper: That's nothing! Watch me sign my entire full name to that document! Dilbert: Sometimes you can be predictable. Topper: That's nothing! I don't even have free will!

Nothing Else To Talk About

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Nothing Else To Talk About - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #personality, #boring, #bored, #conversation, #small talk, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Do you want to know how we would have handled this situation at my old job? Dilbert: No. Dilbert: Nothing would interest me less. Man: My only other topics of conversation are my health problems and TV shows you haven't seen. Dilbert: I stand corrected.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #app, #developer, #workload, #ideas, #obliviousness, #unrealistic, #goals

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: I have a great idea for an app. And I choose you to be on my start-up team. I'll be the idea person and you do all of the technology. Dilbert: So... I would be doing 100 percent of the work? Tina: I already did the hard part of coming up with an idea. Your part is just typing. So stop complaining and type me an app. Dilbert: It isn't that easy. Tina: Can you recommend someone less lazy?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #health, #morning, #waking up, #sleepless, #complaining, #manager, #sociopath, #emotions

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Can you take a call with our Elbonian customers at 6 a.m. tomorrow? Dilbert: Sure. All I need to do is put my health at risk by not getting enough sleep tonight. Of course, I'll hate your guts for making me come to work so early. And I would expect my bad attitude to infect my co-workers and make them less productive, too. My lack of sleep will affect my decision-making, obviously. And I"m working on important projects, so the ripple effect could be catastrophic. So, do you still want me to be here at 6 a.m. tomorrow? Boss: Yes. You don't have to be a sociopath to be a manager, but it helps.

Naming The Spaceship

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Naming The Spaceship - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #naming, #space, #space flight, #rocket, #engineering, #failure, #death, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Ted: I'm looking for a name for the spaceship that I designed. Dilbert: How about "Death Tube?" Alice: "Space Debris?" Wally: "Final Resting Place?" Ted: I was hoping for something more positive. Voice: We're positive it will explode.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #happiness, #work, #torture, #human resources, #hr, #manipulation, #content, #psychology, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: The one called Dilbert is showing signs of happiness at work. Boss: That means we can give him more work and he won't quit. Excellent. Is anyone else exhibiting signs of unauthorized happiness? Catbert: No. Everyone else is in the narrow band of misery you want them to be in. If they were any happier, it would mean you're overpaying them. If they were any less happy, the would take their own lives. If you don't hear any laughing or screaming, it means you're doing something right. Boss: What about moans? Catbert: Moans are ideal. That's the sweet spot.