Small Phone Comic Strips - Page 50

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515 Results for Small Phone

View 491 - 500 results for small phone comic strips. Discover the best "Small Phone" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 29, 2017's comic on:


Tags #cell phone, #conversation, #meeting, #business, #technology

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Why isn't anyone else here yet? Did you tell them you changed the meeting time? I asked you to tell everyone. That isn't my job. Then why didn't you tell me you weren't going to do it?!! It isn't my job to tell you what isn't my job. Now this meeting is a waste of my time. Does your job description tell you to attend meetings that are worthless? I didn't know there were other kinds.

Boss Tweets Racist Stuff

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Boss Tweets Racist Stuff - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 25, 2017's comic on:


Tags #cell phone, #conversation, #desk, #sitting, #technology

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You retweeted a racist conspiracy theory. I did? I checked snopes.com, and they say it is not true that Elbonians evolved from pandas less than a hundred years ago. You might want to delete the tweet. nah. What's the worst that can happen?

Boss Tweets Sexist Stuff

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Boss Tweets Sexist Stuff - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 26, 2017's comic on:


Tags #cell phone, #computer, #conversation, #desk, #tweets, #technology

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Our customers organized a boycott because of your racist tweet. I know. That's why I tweeted out some witty insults at the organizers. Your new tweets are sexist. Notice how the make you forget about my racist tweets?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 09, 2017's comic on:


Tags #complaining, #listening, #small talk

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Boss: How's work? Dilbert: Well, since you asked... it's like being trapped in a garbage compactor and no one can hear me scream. All my hopes and dreams have died, along with my immune system and my dignity. The only thing keeping me alive is that food tastes good. I tried to escape into my imagination, but I learned I don't have one. My life has no meaning. Each second is a slow-motion ordeal. Why do I get the feeling you weren't listening to any of that? Boss:My day was good too.

Wally's Invention Goes Into Production

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Wally's Invention Goes Into Production - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 22, 2017's comic on:


Tags #invention, #success, #laziness, #fairness, #unfair

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Alice: The board decided to put your invention of a phone charger that warms coffee into production. Market surveys show enormous demand. You're probably going to be our Employee Of The Year. This disturbs me on many levels. Wally: Genius is often disruptive.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 30, 2017's comic on:


Tags #technology, #cognition, #distraction, #Entertainment, #mindless, #cell phone, #internet, #social media

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Dilbert: I wanted to be productive this week but the big tech companies didn't let me. Boss: That's ridiculous. They can't stop people from doing work. Dilbert: Actually, they can. Their business models depend on interrupting users with ads, and apps, and mindless entertainment. Until recently, humans could resist these distractions. But now the tech companies are using science to make their apps addictive. They learned how to hijack our brains. What started as simple entertainment evolved into military-grade mind control. Did you hear any of that? Boss: Any of what?

Dogbert The Special Counsel

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Dogbert The Special Counsel - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 21, 2017's comic on:


Tags #trump, #comey, #obstruction, #russia, #collusion

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Boss: Everyone says you've been colluding with our Elbonian competitors. I've assigned a special counsel to review all of your email and phone logs. Dilbert: I've done nothing wrong. Dogbert: Stop trying to obstruct justice.

Dilbert Is Cleared Of Colluding

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Dilbert Is Cleared Of Colluding - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 22, 2017's comic on:


Tags #crime, #attorney, #lawyer, #collusion, #donald trump, #russia, #legal

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Dogbert: I've investigated Dilbert's email and phone records and I can say with confidence he did not collude with Elbonia. But there are many, many other crimes he might have committed, and you should pay me to investigate them. Dilbert: That wasn't helpful. Dogbert: Stop making it all about you.

Scientists Confirm We Are Simulations

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Scientists Confirm We Are Simulations - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 31, 2017's comic on:


Tags #reality, #simulation, #aliens, #alternate universe, #perception

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News: Scientists confirmed that our reality is actually a software simulation created by an advanced civilization. Dilbert: That makes no sense unless the advanced civilization is a bunch of psychopaths who like to see us suffer. Catbert1: One of the idiots in our simulation is insulting us. Catbert2: I'm going to break his phone screen.

Suboptimal Barry Dingle

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Suboptimal Barry Dingle  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 06, 2017's comic on:


Tags #annoyance, #open-door policy, #corporate culture, #pest

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Barry: Hi, I'm Barry Dingle. I hang around your office door and ask you questions every time you get off the phone. Boss: I hate that. Barry: You can blame your open-door policy for all of it. Boss: This is sub-optimal.