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504 Results for Five Percent Raise

View 501 - 504 results for five percent raise comic strips. Discover the best "Five Percent Raise" comics from Dilbert.com.

Dogbert Designs Headphones

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Dogbert Designs Headphones - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 26, 2020's comic on:


Tags #design, #business, #headphones, #maximum, #customer, #annoyance, #charging, #port, #guess, #incorrect, #frustration, #fit, #customers, #ship, #user

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dogbert: i've designed these over-ear headphones for maximum customer annoyance. the charging port is only on one side, so the user has a fifty percent chance of guessing wrong. and the charger only fits if you put it right-side up. to increase the frustration, i made the plug look the same on both sides. best of all, the plug is so poorly designed that half the time it doesn't seem to fit, even when you put it in correctly. i made the headphones black, so you can't easily find the charger hole in low light. ninety percent of users will be cursing us every time they try to recharge. customers won't know any of this until after they purchase. boss: ship it.

Social Distancing

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Social Distancing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 25, 2020's comic on:


Tags #business, #eighties, #health, #hug, #managers & supervisors, #practice, #social distancing, #virus, #coronavirus

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boss with face mask: wally, i need you to practice "social distancing" until the virus risk has passed. wally: i already do that. i haven't hugged anyone since the eighties. boss: good job. high-five. wally: back off.

Ceo Does Math

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Ceo Does Math - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 29, 2020's comic on:


Tags #death & dying, #diseases, #earth, #humans, #sarcasm, #pandemic, #virus

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CEO: Why is everyone so panicked about coronavirus when maybe only 1% who get it will die? Catbert: One percent of the population of Earth would be...77 million dead. CEO: Yes, but the whole world won't get it. Catbert: They will if they listen to you.