Catbert Comic Strips - Page 52
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655 Results for Catbert
View 511 - 520 results for Catbert comic strips. Discover the best "Catbert" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday September 24,
2002
Tags chronic mahjobbis, puke, doctor, exam, diagnosis, user interfaces, designed by engineers, interface poisoning, dead in a week, medical
Transcript
The Boss points to a slide and says, "Our dress code policy will go back to business attire." The Boss continues, "And I will keep changing the dress code until I find the clothing style that makes our profits go up!" Headline: Later, At The Sartorial Alchemy Lab. The Boss and Catbert are both wearing safety goggles. A shirt is being hung from a machine and The Boss is holding out a shoe. The Boss says, "Watch out. This might spark."
Monday July 21,
2003
Tags psychics on televison, software testing staff, one medium, punish them
Transcript
"I've noticed that deadd people know a lot. They're always yapping to psychics on television." "We could kill the entire software-testing staff and replace them with one medium." "Do you see any problem with that?" "If the dead people lie, how would we punish them?"
Monday August 18,
2003
Tags multiple personalities, fired cowboy, little girl, twins, aftrenoon, mime
Transcript
"I'm trying to fire a guy who has multiple personalities." "I'm exhausted. I fired the cowboy, the little girl, and the astronaut this morning. I'll do the twins later this afternoon." "I'm tired, but it's a good tired." "Can I do the mime?"
Friday December 26,
2003
Tags rehired, alice back, dulled instincts, first day abck, business picking up
Transcript
The Boss: Business is picking up. We need to rehire some of the people that we downsized. I hope the time off from work hasn't dulled their engineering instincts. The first day back is always the hardest.
Wednesday February 18,
2004
Tags home theater, dvd, hd, dvr, satellite dish, mp3, widescreen, universal remote, people over, turn on
Transcript
The Boss: "My new home theater is amazing." "It's got a dvd, hd, dvr, fm, satellite dish, mp3, widescreen tv, seven speakers and a universal remote." "It's fun to invite people over so they can show me how to turn it on."
Tuesday June 01,
2004
Tags evil director, illeagal, age, sex, martital status, ethnicity, fifty year old, mongrel spinster
Transcript
"Evil director of H.R." "It's illegal for me to ask about age, sex, marital status, weight, ethnicity or disabilities." "But I can see that youre a fifty-year-old, 145-pund, mongrel spinster with some coordination issues." "Do you have any problem working on Christmas?"
Friday September 24,
2004
Tags have plan, division perfromance, worst division, average performance, merge
Transcript
The boss: I have a plan to avoid paying division performance bonuses. I'll merge our group with the worst division so our average performance is lower. her- hee! I should be eay because every division manager is already begging to merge with me.
Monday November 01,
2004
Tags sexy project, boost career, sound good better job, nano tech nology, fighting terrorists
Transcript
The Boss: I need to be managing a sexier project to boost my career. \it only has to sound good and not fail until I geta better job. How about a nanotechnology set cell for fighting terrorists? Dilbert: O-O-OKay.
Monday November 29,
2004
Tags main prodcut, coming off patent, profits will plunge, shallowm, paid for there inventions
Transcript
Our main product is coming off patent. "Profits will plunge and so will my bonus. It's not fair." "Call me shallow. But I enjoy getting paid for other people's inventions." "SHALLOW!"
Thursday December 02,
2004
Tags financial troll, demands lower prices, shopping, walgetco
Transcript
Financial troll: "Every time we cut costs, our distributor, Walgetco, takes the gain by demanding lower prices." The Boss: "Thank you for shopping at Walgetco! Have a nice day!" Financial Troll "Maybe it's too late." The boss: "Troll accessories are on aisle six!"


