Protect Money Comic Strips - Page 52
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626 Results for Protect Money
View 511 - 520 results for protect money comic strips. Discover the best "Protect Money" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday July 14,
2015
How The Elbonians Spun It
Tags #slavery, #slave, #slaves, #semantics, #owner, #ownership, #obliviousness, #wages, #money, #pay, #payment
Transcript
Dilbert: How's it going with the Elbonians you bought on the Internet? CEO: I had to set them free. Turns out it was slavery after all. Dilbert: You made them work without pay. CEO: Yeah, that's the spin they put on it, too.
Saturday August 08,
2015
The World Always Needs Bankers
Tags #banking, #big business, #college, #crime, #debt, #future, #hope, #job, #money, #robot, #robots, #stealing, #business, #education
Transcript
Carol: My son is trying to pick a major for college. Do you have any advice? Dilbert: Well, it will take him fifteen years to pay off his student loans, but most jobs will be replaced by robots in ten. But the world always needs bankers. Carol: We're trying to steer him away from crime.
Sunday August 09,
2015
Tags #employee, #Advice, #health, #wellness, #money, #cost, #work ethic, #fatigue, #Family, #marriage, #support, #insult, #relationships
Transcript
Dilbert: The long hours of work are taking a toll on my body. Can I take some time off for my health? Boss; That would defeat the whole point of being an employee. You are supposed to be trading your health and happiness for money. Then you give that money to your family and watch them spend it while you eat yourself to death. It's a circle of life sort of thing. Dilbert: I'm not married. Boss: Loser.
Wednesday September 09,
2015
Ceo Gets Paid More For Creating Nothing
Tags #small talk, #conversation, #criticism, #executives, #salary, #wages, #fairness, #offense, #offend, #money
Transcript
Dilbert: Do you ever think it's weird that you get paid a hundred times more than me? I invented our core technology. All you did was interview better than a few other people who didn't invent anything. I'm not good at small talk. CEO: I would totally fire you if I could invent things.
Friday September 11,
2015
Value Of A Start Up Idea
Saturday September 12,
2015
Writing Code In Spare Time
Tuesday September 15,
2015
Dilbert's Project Is Late
Tags #raise, #wages, #money, #salary, #catch-22, #anger, #frustration, #labor, #review
Transcript
Boss: I can't give you a raise because you didn't finish your project on time. Dilbert: That's because you make me work on your personal project half of every day. Boss: You have to learn to say no. Dilbert: I've never wanted to kill you more than right now.
Friday September 18,
2015
Boss Hoards Gold Unless Hungry
Tags #gold, #apocalypse, #money, #Food, #priorities, #hunger, #fool
Transcript
Boss: You'll be sorry when the world economy collapses. But I'll be okay because I hoarded gold at my house. Alice: On day two, you'll trade all of it for a sandwich. Boss: Only if I'm hungry.
Sunday September 20,
2015
Tags #managers & supervisors, #credit, #motivation, #obliviousness, #hiring, #logic, #business
Transcript
Boss: The secret to success is hiring the right people. Dilbert: Then why doesn't everyone do that? Boss: It takes a lot of skill to hire the right people. Dilbert: Did you just find a way to take all of the credit for the team's success? And did you do it in a clever way that was intended to make you look humble even while hogging all the credit? Boss: I also motivate you. Dilbert: You're money?
Thursday September 24,
2015
Ceo Compensation
Tags #money, #worth, #salary, #wages, #fairness, #fair, #pay, #expenses, #saving, #rich people, #executives
Transcript
Dilbert: I just saw your net worth on the Internet. What's this meeting about anyway? CEO: It's about keeping expenses down. Dilbert: More for you? CEO: That's not the spin I was going to put on it.