Arms Out Comic Strips - Page 53
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1000 Results for Arms Out
View 521 - 530 results for arms out comic strips. Discover the best "Arms Out" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday September 08,
1991
Tags Dilbert, meeting, copy, agenda, wrong, awkward, leave, casually, problem, economy, deeper, interest, rates, cover, dark
Transcript
Dilbert enters a conference room and asks, "Is this the meeting?" People at the table mumble a response. Dilbert says, "Good." A man says, "Everybody take a copy of the agenda." Dilbert reads the agenda and thinks, "I'm in the wrong meeting . . . Now it's too awkward to leave." Dilbert thinks, "I'll casually stretch my arms, flick the lights off and escape under cover of dark." Dilbert turns the light off. Several people say, "Ouch!" Five people lie on top of each other in the doorway. The man says, "Oh, sorry, wrong agenda." Dilbert arrives at home wearing tattered clothing. He tells Dogbert, "I'm starting to think that the problem with our economy is deeper than high interest rates."
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Sunday September 22,
1991
Tags Dogbert, dinosaur, fish, with, legs, life, form, work, hard, part, mate, Kids, mutants, arm, dangerfield
Transcript
Dogbert walks in the park. A fish with legs comes walking down the path. The fish says, "Howdy!" Dogbert says, "I've never seen a fish with legs." The fish explains, "I'm evolving into a higher life form." Dogbert says, "That sounds like a lot of work." The fish says, "Yeah . . . The hard part is finding a mate who isn't turned off by legs." The fish continues, "With any luck, the kids will be mutants too." The fish continues, "I'm hoping they'll have arms but not look too much like Rodney Dangerfield." The fish stands at the edge of a pond. He tells a female fish, "These legs are a natural advantage!" The female says, "Oh, that's original."
Sunday October 20,
1991
Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, butterfly, bug, flying, much, now, kill, flatten, becomes, beautiful, work, art, guts, wings, evenly, spaced, ants, pants, mother, nature, standing, resist
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert sit in the bushes. Dilbert points and says, "Look! A beautiful Regency butterfly!" Dogbert says, "Beautiful?? It's a flying BUG." Dilbert says, "It may not seem like much now . . ." Dilbert continues, "But after we kill it, dip it in chemicals, and flatten it between glass, it becomes a beautiful work of art!" Dogbert asks, "Do we throw away the bug guts and just keep the wings?" Dilbert replies, "No. The guts keep the wings evenly spaced." Dilbert screams and yells, "Ants in my pants!!" He jumps out of the bushes. As Dilbert runs away, a woman comes out of the bushes. Dogbert says, "Mother Nature!" Mother Nature says, "He was standing right on an anthill. I couldn't resist."
Sunday December 15,
1991
Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, trick, dust, mother, teach, grey, fox, brownie, recipe
Transcript
Dogbert sits on his pillow. Dilbert enters the room holding a dust mop. He tells Dogbert, "I'm going to dust." Dogbert's ears fly up. Dogbert runs out of the room. Dilbert dusts a table. Dilbert dusts a lamp. Clouds of dust begin to rise. Dilbert dusts a picture and the dust clouds get bigger. A cloud of dust fills the room. Dilbert thinks, "I'm starting to think there's a trick to this." Dilbert sits in his chair covered with dirt. Dogbert asks, "Did your mother teach you to dust that way?" Dilbert replies, "We didn't call her the 'Grey Fox' because of her clever brownie recipe."
Sunday December 22,
1991
Tags christmas, Dogbert, Dilbert, duck, sled, santa, fell, dropped, head, alive, jolly, elf, holiday, season, myself, gifts, stole, buried, backyard, wars, venison, taste
Transcript
The caption says, "'Twas the night before Christmas . . . " Santa Claus and his reindeer fly over the rooftops. The caption says, "When a duck hit the sled . . ." A duck crashes into Santa. The story continues, "Santa fell out . . ." Santa dives toward the ground. The caption continues, "And dropped on his head . . ." Santa crashes through the roof of a house. The caption continues, "He was barely alive, this jolly old elf . . ." Dogbert stands next to the fireplace. Santa lies on the floor near the Christmas tree. The caption continues, "'Twas the holiday season, so I thought of myself . . ." Dogbert says, "Hey! I don't see any gifts here!" The caption continues, "So I stole his hat and buried him in the back yard. The end." Dogbert walks through the back yard wearing Santa's hat and holding a shovel. Dogbert sits in his chair holding a book. He says, "Um . . . This is interesting, Dogbert." Dogbert replies, "The sequel is titled 'Elf Wars: The Taste of Venison.'"
Sunday December 29,
1991
Tags curiosity, information, secret, Dilbert, meeting, brief, companys, policy, locked, night, great, value, competitors, companies, pay, annual, salary, best, work
Transcript
Dilbert stands at the front of a conference room. He says, "I've been asked to brief everybody on the company's policy for protecting secret information." Dilbert continues, "All secret information must be locked up at night." Dilbert continues, "Our secrets could be of great value to our competitors." Dilbert continues, "In fact, some companies try to buy the secrets of their competitors." A woman asks, "Just out of curiosity, how much would our competitors pay for our secrets?" Dilbert replies, "Oh, I dunno . . . Maybe several times your annual salary." The people at the table smirk at each other. Dilbert thinks, "I don't think this was some of my best work."
Sunday January 19,
1992
Tags Dilbert, doves, killed, help, loyal, dog, illegal, zoo, rusty, neighbors, time
Transcript
Dilbert and his uncle sit at a table eating dinner. Dilbert says, "Uncle Ned, can we see your hunting trophies after dinner?" Dilbert looks at a mounted bear head and says, "Oooh . . ." Ned says, "I bagged this one at the zoo." Dilbert says, "The zoo? That's illegal." Ned replies, "No wonder everybody got so excited." Ned shows Dilbert some other plaques and says, "These are some doves I killed with the help of my loyal dog, Rusty." They walk past a mounted dog and Ned says, "That's Rusty. We ran out of doves . . ." They look at the heads of a man, woman and cat. Ned says, "These were my neighbors - Florence, Dave and Muffin." Dilbert carries Dogbert under his arm and says, "Hey, look at the time! Got to run!" Ned asks, "Don't you want to see my 'Hall-O'-Postal Employees'?" Dilbert and Dogbert leave the house. Dilbert says, "New rule: Find out their hobbies before you eat their pot roast." Dogbert says, "We should have stayed for the 'Hall-O'-Postal Employees.'"
Monday January 08,
1996
Tags performance review, engineering work, shoved down stairs, killed boss, forces of darkeness, posses body
Transcript
The caption says, "Performance Review." Alice sits across from Ted's desk. Ted reads a document and says, "Your engineering work was excellent, Alice. But there was the little incident where you . . ." Ted stands, revealing a devil's tail, and screams, "Shoved me down a flight of stairs and killed me, thus inviting the forces of darkness to possess my body!!!" Alice holds up a crucifix and yells, "Back!" Dilbert sees Alice walking out of Ted's office and asks, "How'd it go?" Alice replies, "I swear, this job is all politics."
Wednesday January 10,
1996
Tags stake through heart, demon mossed boss, raisin sized heart, blue betty pen
Transcript
Dilbert and Wally stand against the wall on either side of the door to Ted's office. Dilbert says, "Alice is ready to drive a stake through the heart of our demon-possessed boss." Wally and Dilbert hide in the hallway. From inside the office, they hear, "Whack, whack, whack!" Ted and Alice walk out the office door. Ted has many pens stuck in his chest. He says, "It's times like these when I'm glad my heart is the size of a raisin!" Alice says to Wally, "I need all of your pens, including 'Blue Betty.'" Wally's mouth hangs open in shock.
Thursday January 11,
1996
Tags over internet, credit card number, insecure
Transcript
Dilbert and Liz sit at a table in a restaurant. Dilbert says, "I would never buy something over the internet. I'd hate to have my credit card number floating around out there." Dilbert hands his credit card to the waitress as he says, "There are a lot of unscrupulous people on the net." The caption says, "Later." Dilbert concludes, ". . . Bottom line, it just isn't common sense." The waitress returns wearing a fur coat and hands Dilbert's credit card back to him.


