Company Comic Strips - Page 55
Search Filters
Year
- 2023
- 2022
- 2021
- 2020
- 2019
- 2018
- 2017
- 2016
- 2015
- 2014
- 2013
- 2012
- 2011
- 2010
- 2009
- 2008
- 2007
- 2006
- 2005
- 2004
- 2003
- 2002
- 2001
- 2000
- 1999
- 1998
- 1997
- 1996
- 1995
- 1994
- 1993
- 1992
- 1991
- 1990
- 1989
Character
882 Results for Company
View 541 - 550 results for company comic strips. Discover the best "Company" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday December 12,
2003
Tags product training, pride in product line, users experience, painful boils, relatively satisfied customers, techniques
Transcript
Product Training. Man: You work for a company that takes pride in its product line. Only half of our users experience painful boils. We call that group the "relatively satisfied customers. what the?!
Monday December 29,
2003
Tags ceo, move offcie, near ceo home, hug expense, eat mud and die, stock options, buy hummer
Transcript
The Boss: "Our company is relocating to be nearer to our CEO's home." "When asked about the justification for the huge expense, our CO quipped, 'HA HA HA! Eat mud and die!'" "Then he gave himself some stock options and went to buy a Hummer."
Thursday January 01,
2004
Tags office relocation, procedures, wrong cubicle, easily stealable, move computer, rules and regulations, company rules
Transcript
Office relocation. Esok: you are not allowed to move you own computer. It must be left in an easily sealable condition for three days until the movers take it to the wrong cubicle. Then untrained I.T Professionals will shove an ethernet cable and stapler and call it good. Dilbert: get out of my way
Tuesday January 06,
2004
Tags cell phone bill, expense, award, speech, lost cell phone, low bill, company phone
Transcript
"The expense cutters award goes to Wally for drastically lowering his cell phone bill." "Wally, would you like to say a few words to the group?" "I lost my phone last month. Hey, thanks for the hundred dollars!"
Friday February 06,
2004
Tags compnay, synonymous with crime, incompetence, new logo, computer graohics, crime
Transcript
"Dogbert Consults." Dogbert: "Your company has become synonymous with incompetence and crime." "Stop trying to be all things to all people. Focus on either the incompetence OR the crime." "For your new logo, I used computer graphics to create a composite face that looks totally incompetent." "Wow."
Monday February 09,
2004
Tags typo discovered, driving staretgy, eberyone, avery wong, free delivery
Transcript
Ask: "I discovered a typo in the market forecast that is driving our company strategy." "Where it says,'Everyone would want one,' it should have said, 'Every Wong would want one." "Worse yet, I called Mr. Wong and he said he was joking." The Boss: "What if we gave him free delivery?"
Thursday April 08,
2004
Tags borrow chair, leave callateral, financial officer
Transcript
Financial officer: "May I borrow your chair for a meeting?" Dilbert: "Okay, but leave your wallet, keys, company ID, and one shoe with me." Financial officer: "I'm your chief financial officer." Dilbert: "Then I also need your PDA and one sock."
Monday April 12,
2004
Tags tainted research, skinny people, bright light, association of donught makers, wheel chair, man in bandages
Transcript
"I'm starting a company that specializes in doing tainted research." "The Association of Doughnut Makers asked me to prove that skinny people can't go to heaven." "Did you see a bright light before the doctors revived you?" "No, why?"
Tuesday April 13,
2004
Tags poorly designed product, ever been killed, tainted research
Transcript
"This is the Dogbert research company. Have you ever been killed by a poorly designed product?" "My tainted research shows that your products haven't killed anyone." "For an extra $50,000, I can call a second person." "I don't want to jinx it."


