New Employee Comic Strips - Page 55

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View 541 - 550 results for new employee comic strips. Discover the best "New Employee" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags social misfits, keep him away, normal people, engineering liason

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Dilbert sits at his computer working. The Boss approaches with a new employee. The Boss says to the new employee, "Dilbert is one of our social misfits." The Boss says to the new employee, "Your job is to keep him away from normal people." Dilbert, still facing his computer is obviously annoyed by what he is hearing. Unable to keep quiet, Dilbert yells without turning around, "Hello! I'm right here!" The Boss and the new employee unaffected by Dilbert's outburst, continue their conversation. The Boss says to the new employee, "Your title will be Engineering Liason."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new engineering liason, claims of meaning

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Wally approaches the Engineering Liaison and says, "I understand you're the new Engineering Liaison." Wally asks, "Does that mean what I think it means?" She does not reply. Wally says to Asok, "She claims it doesn't mean that." Asok replies, "Ohhh."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags demons possessed, view websites, unspeakable abominations, approve the purchase

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Wally says to the Boss, "Demons have possessed my PC. They force me to view websites of unspeakable abominations." Wally continues, "The only solution is for you to approve the purchase of a new PC for me." Dilbert approaches Wally, now sitting at his computer and asks, "How are the unspeakable abominations today?" Wally replies, "Much faster."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cep, obscenely wealthy, guest house, build house, speech writer, workers, made him rich, bragging, condescending, truth

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Ed stands at the podium and says, "As CEO, I thank you for making me obscenely wealthy." Alice, Wally and Dilbert continue to sit and listen. Ed goes on to say, "Yesterday, I built a guest house using bundles of cash as bricks." Ed looks down at his paper, thinking "I need a new speech writer."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags three bulls points, summarize, project, invent words, new words, splrgy, noobah, pizkwat

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Dilbert speaks at the podium. "I've been asked to summarize my project into three bullet points." Dilbert says, "I had to invent some new words." Pointing to these words (Splurby, Noobah, Pizkwat), Dilbert says "Believe me, you don't want to be any of these things."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags learn new technology, sales person, everything he knows, moist towelettes, sponge bath

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Dilbert says to the Boss, "I need to take a class to learn the new technology." The Boss replies, "Our vendor's sales person will teach you everything he knows." The sales person begins explaining to Dilbert, who sits taking notes. "You only need 'three moist towelettes' to give yourself a sponge bath."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags advertsisemnst, fame, new ceo, recommend exploit, hi tech industry

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Standing on a desk Dogbert says to the Boss, "Your new CEO is the most powerful woman in the hi-tech industry." Dogbert contiues, "I recommend exploiting her fame in your advertisements." Holding a bikini set attached to a hanger, the Boss replies "Why do I have to be the one to suggest it?" Dogbert answers, "CEOs love this sort of thing."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ad campiagn, festured, new ceo, powerful woman, indutry, than lines

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Dogbert sits next to the Boss at a table. The Boss says, "My consultant thinks you should be featured in our ad campaign." An attractive woman sits behind a large desk and says, "Is that because I'm the new CEO and the most powerful woman in our industry?" The Boss answers, "Umm...yes. That's why." Dogbert turns and says, "Remember to ask about tan lines."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boss, edfred, freak, new hire, new plan, trust, two faced employee, two headed

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EDFRED: Hi, Im Edfred the two faced employee. If you tell your boss his new plan is stupid I'll back you up. Dilbert: Really? I don't like the looks of this.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags two faced, employee, see one, turn around, other faces, confusing, frustrating, pointing

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Edfred: I disagree with Dilbert. The boss's plan is brilliant. Dilbert: Your other face agreed with me two minutes ago! What other face? No...I still just see the one.