Nose Job Comic Strips - Page 56
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Character
991 Results for Nose Job
View 551 - 560 results for nose job comic strips. Discover the best "Nose Job" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday May 31,
2006
Tuesday May 30,
2006
Saturday May 27,
2006
Wednesday May 24,
2006
Thursday May 11,
2006
Tags animals in human situations, career, criticism, jobs, pet ownership, counselor, pity
Transcript
Career Counselor Woman: And why did you leave your last job? Dilbert: My dog was tired of hearing me whine about my job, so he became a billionaire and bought my company and fired me. Woman: I don't have a checkbox for that so I'll just write in "loser".
Saturday May 06,
2006
Friday May 05,
2006
Sunday April 23,
2006
Transcript
Your management performance has been abysmal. I'm afraid I have to minimize you. "Minimize? Is that like downsize?" "Downsizing is only for non-managers." "Abysmal managers get minimized. Follow me." "Your new office is the size of a refrigerator crisper." "You will have no direct reports and your job title will be 'Director of Unnecessary and Special Projects.'" "Can I ever be maximized?" "Maybe if some other manager jumps off the roof." "You're right - the view up here is spectacular!"
Tuesday April 11,
2006
Tags trigger automatic promotion, be that employee, part of team, not special
Transcript
I need to have one more direct report and it will trigger an automatic promotion for me. "Your job is to be that employee." "How's it feel to be part of the team?" "Not as special as I'd hoped."
Sunday February 26,
2006
Transcript
"Why is your project months behind?" "I still don't have the user's requirements because she's a complete nut job." "It's your job to manage that process!" "I complained to her boss, who promptly misinterpreted the problem and ordered her to work on the wrong stuff." "Then every member of her family got a serious illness. Then she got called to jury duty." "She promised to give me the requirements this afternoon." "It was too hard to come up with my own requirements, so I just copied the requirements from another product." "Is the other product similar to what you want?" "Where are you going with this?"

