Retail Business Comic Strips - Page 57
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1000 Results for Retail Business
View 561 - 570 results for retail business comic strips. Discover the best "Retail Business" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday June 23,
2004
Tags job, last job, sued last job, poor judegment, job interview, business
Transcript
The Boss: Why did you leave your last job? They told me that I have incredibly poor judgment. So I sued them
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Monday July 19,
2004
Tags hairball, stock options, evil director, human resources, bous system, kindness of management, business
Transcript
Catbert: Evil director of human resources Catbert: stock options will be replaced with a bonus system. Dilbert: So....now my happiness depends on the kindness of management instead of the gullibility of our investors? Catbert: allow me to respond by hacking a hairball in your direction.
Saturday July 24,
2004
Tags marketing, dumpster diving, feral, product specs, feral employee, business
Transcript
The feral employee Marketing wouldn't give me the product specs. So I made this face and rifled through their dumpster. and you found the product specs? French fry.
Wednesday August 11,
2004
Tags human resources, sow the seeds, discontent, massive disloyalty, riots, disloyalty, business
Transcript
The boss: "Send the salary spreadsheet to Human Resources." "Don't let anyone else see it. That sort of information could sow the seeds of discontent." "We'd have massive disloyalty, fights, vandalism, maybe even riots."
Monday August 16,
2004
Tags meeting, improve communication, imitates boss, business
Transcript
Man: I called this meeting so I could tell you the division's goals for next year. Alice: Thats a good idea because we're all so dumb that we coldly possibly read this in email. Goal one: Improve communication. ALiceL I can't. Im too dumb.
Monday August 23,
2004
Tags meeting, team assignments, mprotant things, ruined meeting, clueless nimrods, business
Transcript
The Boss: "Alice, I've been told that you ignore your team's assignments and work on things that aren't your job." Alice: "That's true. I do important things instead of useless things assigned by clueless nimrods." The Boss: "You totally ruined this meeting."
Saturday August 28,
2004
Tags suspicious, nap, evil director, wellness program, human resources, business
Transcript
"Catbert: Evil director of human resources" "Have you heard about the employee wellness program?" "If you call in sick on a Monday or a Friday, your boss says, 'Well, well, well- that's very suspicious.'" "Now if you'll excuse me, I feel a nap coming on."
Monday August 30,
2004
Tags evil director, human resources, cubicles, open plan, special class, transition, invisible walls, business
Transcript
CAtbert: Evil director of human resources Catbert: cubicles are too expensive. we're moving to an open plan, You'll attend a special classy to ease your transition. Wally: its like he's in a cubicle with invisible walls!
Monday July 30,
2012
Tags business failures/bankruptcies, stock market, innovative pordcuts, in pipeline, r&d budget, firings, sexy startup, work smarter, ironic, money
Transcript
Boss: Our stock is down 49% and we have no innovative products in the pipeline. CEO: Slash the R&D budget, fire 9,000 employees, and buy a sexy start-up company that we can run into the ground. Boss: We did all of that last year. CEO: Did I already tell the employees to work smarter? Boss: Yes. They thought you were being ironic.
Tuesday July 31,
2012
Tags managers & supervisors, multitasking, ignorant bafoon, coffee, authority, business
Transcript
Carol: I can't finish everything today. Boss: Try multitasking. Carol: Multitasking? Is that like being an ignorant baboon and drinking coffee at the same time? Boss: I missed what you said because I was drinking coffee.


