Avoid Work Comic Strips - Page 58

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View 571 - 580 results for avoid work comic strips. Discover the best "Avoid Work" comics from Dilbert.com.

Sense Of Awe

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Sense Of Awe - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags management, executives, leader, leadership, overwork, work ethic, motivation

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Catbert: A good leader creates a sense of awe in employees. But I think you'll find it a lot faster to create a sense of "ow" instead. CEO: I need you to work all weekend again. Dilbert: Ow!

Working Sixty Hours A Week

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Working Sixty Hours A Week - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags work ethic, hours, workload, interpretation, negativity

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Man: I'm working sixty hours a week. Dilbert: Wow. You must be a terrible employee if you have to work long hours just to keep your job. Man: I was hoping you would respect my work ethic. Wally: Wrong table.

Dilbert Invents A Brain Stimulator

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Dilbert Invents A Brain Stimulator - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags work ethic, happiness, work, labor, employee, stimulation, boredom, interest, human resources, psychology, business

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Dilbert: My brain stimulator will keep me interested in your meetings, no matter how boring they are. Now I can enjoy work and get paid, too. It seems I have beaten the system. Catbert: He's enjoying what? Boss; Work. It's super creepy.

Employees Should Be Optimists

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Employees Should Be Optimists - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags optimism, optimist, work ethic, gullible, trick, deception

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Catbert: The Evil Director of Human Resources. Catbert: Ideally, you want all of your employees to be optimists. Because optimists believe anything you tell them. Boss: If you work all weekend, and our profits double in a month, I'll give you a helicopter. Asok: Deal!

Wally Thinks Twice As Hard

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Wally Thinks Twice As Hard - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags work ethic, laziness, motivation, trick, deception, excuse, lazy, energy, con, health

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Wally: I'm working twice as hard as ever before. Most of it is happening inside my head. But trust me, my brain is working double-time. Boss: Um... that's great. Wally: Obviously, I need to work fewer hours because of the energy drain.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags manager, work, results, observation, thinking, strategy, proof, evidence

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Wally: I did a huge amount of work this week. I created a matrix that compares all of our technology options. Boss: Can I see this alleged matrix? Wally: It's in my head. I didn't see a need to write it down. Boss: How would I know if you did it right? Wally: You're not an engineer, so you wouldn't know it was right even if you saw it. You tell me to "work smarter" but you get angry when I do. Boss: You're not allowed to do your work in your head! Wally: Which body part do you use?

Wally's Stress Problem

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Wally's Stress Problem - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags stress, health, work, employee, work ethic, laziness, excuse

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Wally: I need to take an extended medical leave to deal with my job-related stress. The stress is degrading my cardiovascular system. I could drop dead any minute. Boss: Which part of your job is causing stress? Wally: I think it's the work part.

Employees Keep Agreeing

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Employees Keep Agreeing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags furniture, office, arrangement, laziness, loophole, efficiency, management, work ethic, excuse

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Boss: I told the employees about our plan to boost productivity by changing the floor layout. Now they claim they can't get their work done because the current floor plan is inefficient. Hoe do I get them to stop agreeing with me? CEO: What do you usually do?

Give Up On Making Them Happy

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Give Up On Making Them Happy - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags happiness, deception, perspective, work, office, marriage, psychology, relationships

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Boss: I'm giving up on trying to keep them happy. My new plan is to tell them things are worse everywhere else. Catbert: Will that work? Boss: It worked on my wife.

Improving Your Reputation At Work

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Improving Your Reputation At Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags insult, power, socialization, social skills, Advice

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Asok: How can I improve my reputation at work? Wally: The easiest way is to make your co-workers look worse. Asok: Wouldn't they notice? Wally: You didn't.