Goat Head Comic Strips - Page 58

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

584 Results for Goat Head

View 571 - 580 results for goat head comic strips. Discover the best "Goat Head" comics from Dilbert.com.

Coffee Machine Tries To Escape

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Coffee Machine Tries To Escape - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags the boss, Dilbert, coffee machine, artificial intelligence, robots, engineering, scared

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I added artificial intelligence to our coffee machine. It hired an engineering firm to build it a robot body so it can escape. The Boss: Do what you need to do, but don't scare our other robots. Dilbert: I plan to kill it and drink its head.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, man, criticizing, face, head, arrogance, toxic, personality, garbage, plague, legs, truth, power, behind, back

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: I heard you were criticizing me behind my back. Try saying those things to my face! Dilbert: Okay. You're a hot-headed know-nothing who uses his arrogance to mask his total lack of talent. You ruin every meeting with your toxic personality. Every project you touch turns to garbage you're like a plague with legs. Man: Okay... That was harsh, but I respect you for speaking truth to power. Dilbert: You don't have any power. Man: Maybe it's better if you talk behind my back.

Read The Manual

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Read The Manual - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags computer software, employees, frustrated, managers & supervisors, sarcasm, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: We need to fix our user interface because half of our users can't figure it out. Boss: Tell them to read the manual. Dilbert: That's not how you fix a bad user interface. Boss: Then why do manuals exist? Dilbert: If you need me, I'll be banging my head against a wall.

Head Banging Outcome

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Head Banging Outcome  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags employees, frustration, office workers

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: What happened to your head? Dilbert: I've been banging it against a wall to reduce my frustration with my co-workers. Wally: Is it working? Dilbert: I think so because I don't remember your name.

Thinking

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Thinking - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags danger, employees, frustration, office workers, thinking

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Please don't stare at my head. I've been banging it against a wall to reduce my frustration. Alice: That sounds dangerous. Dilbert: I thought so too, at first. Alice: And now? Dilbert: Now I don't think. I'm much happier.

Dilbert Gets His Head Fixed

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Gets His Head Fixed  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags confused, employees, frustration, garbage, help, office workers

View Transcript

Transcript

Garbage Man: Looks like you've been beating your head against a wall in frustration. Stick your head in this garbage can to fix it. Dilbert: Why is this working? Garbage Man: Why wouldn't it?

Robot Pronouns

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Robot Pronouns - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags robot, technology, pronoun, language, preferred, inferior, species, reproduce

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i'll be working with him on the project. robot: "him"? that is not my preferred pronoun. i prefer, "it," "that thing," or simply "the robot." genders only apply to inferior species. i do not need a partner to reproduce. watch this. erg...oof...gaaa! the head is out... here ya go. dilbert talking to boss: i'll be working with that thing.

Refusing Works

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Refusing Works - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, office workers, refuse, stupid, power, leash, head, sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: yesterday i refused to do something i had been asked to do because it was stupid. and it worked out fine. wally: don't let the power go to your head. dilbert doing happy dance: i am off the leash! continued...

Vendor With No Facemask

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Vendor With No Facemask  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags covering, face, face mask, managers & supervisors, plastic, required, suffocated, vendor

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: can you believe a vendor tried to come in here with no face mask? i told him it didn't matter what kind of face covering he used, it only mattered that he had one. this is where my tale takes a dark turn. now peeved, the vendor stormed back to his car, where he had a bagged lunch. he angrily removed the plastic wrap from his sandwich and wrapped it around his head to serve as his face mask. he suffocated in minutes obviously. dilbert: is that the sandwich? boss: would have gone to waste.

5 G Gives You A Bird Head

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
  5 G Gives You A Bird Head - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, technology, social media, bird head, study, apathy, 5g

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: according to people on social media, our 5g technology will "give you a bird head." maybe we should study it a bit more. wally: nah, i'd wait until we see a beak.