Going Somewhere Comic Strips - Page 58

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

591 Results for Going Somewhere

View 571 - 580 results for going somewhere comic strips. Discover the best "Going Somewhere" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #pity, #date, #beauty, #grace, #attracted, #Dogbert, #standards, #woman, #dating

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. Dilbert says, "Heather, there's something I must tell you." Heather says, "Stop . . . Stop right there. I know what you're going to say." Heather continues, "Although it's our first date, you find yourself very attracted to me." Heather continues, "You are stunned by my grace and beauty, and you hope we can be more than friends." Heather continues, "Let me set you straight, Dilbert: this is a pity date. My standards are too high for you." Dilbert says, "Actually, I just wanted to tell you that your dress was tucked into the back of your pantyhose all night." Heather looks shocked. Back at home, Dogbert asks, "How was your date?" Dilbert replies, "Man, it doesn't get any better than that!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #skilled, #possessions, #vaccum, #mercy, #beg, #watch, #dog

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert asks a man with a mohawk and an eyepatch, "Why are you loading our possessions into your van?" The man replies. "Easier to vacuum." Dogbert says, "I must warn you, I'm a skilled watch dog!" Dogbert stands in the driveway and says, "I'm going to watch you until you BEG for mercy!" The man thinks, "I hate this."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #sign, #back, #wendel, #employee, #wall, #check, #janitor

View Transcript

Transcript

A man slaps Dilbert on the back and says, "Hi, Dilbert. How's it going?" Dilbert thinks, "Uh-oh . . . He might have put a 'kick me' sign on my back." He says, "Hi, Wendel." Dilbert thinks, "I'd better stay close to the wall until I can check my back." Dilbert opens the door to the janitor's closet and thinks, "I'll just slip in here and see." Dilbert tries to check his back and thinks, "Can't reach." Dilbert leaves the closet and thinks, "Maybe I should just go home early." Another man slaps Dilbert on the back and says, "Hi, Dilbert. How's it going?" Dilbert groans. The man says to Wendel, "I hope they get some paper towels in the men's room soon." Wendel replies, "Yeah. Dilbert already left for the day."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #woman, #loaves, #bread, #dough, #grocery store, #jimmy, #toaster, #bonded, #post pardom

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits on a park bench with a woman holding a baby. Dogbert asks, "Why are you hugging that loaf of French bread?" The woman replies, "Hee hee! Yeah, newborn babies do look like loaves of bread." Dogbert says, "But in this case I think your baby IS a loaf of French bread." The woman looks closely at the blanket and says, "That would explain the smell of dough." The woman takes the bread out of the blanket. She says, "Must have been a mix-up at the grocery store." The woman says, "I hope this doesn't mean somebody is sticking little Jimmy in a toaster somewhere." Dogbert replies, "I'm sure he'll pop up." The baby pops out of a shopping bag. The woman says, "Ah, there you are in the grocery bag." The woman says, "I think I bonded with the bread." Dogbert says, "Remind me not to eat hoagies at your house."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #lamp, #magic, #genies, #released, #wishes, #disturbed, #wiener, #binding, #contract, #relish, #hot dog

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands on a table rubbing a lamp. Dilbert asks, "Why are you rubbing that lamp?" Dogbert replies, "It's a routine check for magic genies." Dilbert says, "Carry on." A genie pops out of the lamp and says, "You have released me." Dogbert shouts, "Yes!!! Ha, ha!! Now you must grant me three wishes!" The genie replies, "Get real, four-eyes. We don't have a binding contract here." The genie says, "I LIKE living in a lamp. You disturbed me. I'm going to turn you into a wiener and go home." The genie turns Dogbert into a hot dog. He thinks, "At least it's an experience I can relish."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #garbageman, #device, #standard, #anti-light, #resonance, #paris, #truck, #clone, #stigma

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says, "Please, Mister Garbage Man, help us fix Dilbert's cloning device and bring him back to life!!" The garbage man looks at the device and says, "This shouldn't be too hard . . . Standard anti-light resonance filters . . . Yeah, I think I have parts in the truck." Dogbert asks, "You're going to clone him from his own garbage?" The garbage man replies, "Don't tell anybody - there might be a stigma."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #veterinarian, #Dogbert, #doc, #happy, #tongue, #worried, #mirthful

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert walks toward the Dog Doctor. The veterinarian says, "Hi, Dogbert. How are you?" Dogbert replies, "Not so good, Doc." Dogbert explains, "I have a bad case of 'happy tongue.'" The vet says, "Hmm . . . Is your tongue happy for any particular reason?" Dogbert replies, "No reason at all. I'm quite worried." The vet says, "I'm going to prescribe these tongue depressors. Use one every time your tongue gets too mirthful." Dogbert leaves the office humming. The doctor thinks, "I like that dog."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #rat, #mickey, #rodney, #rodent, #bill, #vernon, #vermin, #ratbert, #arm chair, #table

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says to a rat, "If you're going to live here, you need a name." The rat asks, "How about 'Mickey?'" Dogbert replies, "No . . . Big trouble. How about 'Rodney the Rodent?'" The rat asks, "How about 'Bill the Rat?'" Dogbert asks, "Vernon the Vermin?" The rat says, "Ratbert."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #lab rat, #macaroni, #cheese, #through, #wall, #doctor, #die, #over the wall

View Transcript

Transcript

A lab rat thinks, "I hate my life." The rat thinks, "If I eat one more ton of macaroni and cheese I think I'll die . . . Of course, that may be the point." The rat thinks, "Tonight I'm going 'over the wall.' Wait . . . I'm a rat . . . I'll go THROUGH the wall."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #construction, #garage, #paper, #clips, #gold, #watch, #birthdays

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at a banquet table with three other people. The Boss stands at the podium and says, "Thank you all for coming to Irv Klepfurd's retirement celebration." The Boss continues, "Many of you know that Irv has been pilfering office supplies for his entire career." The Boss continues, "In fact, he's only retiring now because he finished construction on his garage made entirely of paper clips." The Boss continues, "This bill is for $87,000 of personal phone calls made from the office." The Boss continues, "Instead of a gold watch, I'm going to write the current time on this yellow sticky pad and slap it on his forehead." The Boss slaps Irv. The Boss continues, "Now . . . I understand we have some birthdays today . . ."