Five World Class Companies Comic Strips - Page 58

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649 Results for Five World Class Companies

View 571 - 580 results for five world class companies comic strips. Discover the best "Five World Class Companies" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 30, 2015's comic on:


Tags #martial arts, #yoga, #stupid, #idiot, #confusion, #tai chi, #karate, #misunderstanding

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Boss: I signed up for a martial arts class. It's something called "yoga." Carol: Have you killed anyone yet? Boss: Not on purpose.

Visualize Your Contribution To Society

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Visualize Your Contribution To Society - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 15, 2015's comic on:


Tags #meaning, #overthinking, #purpose, #value, #distraction, #thinking

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Dilbert: I like to start each workday by visualizing how my work will make the world a better place. Gaaaa!!! My life is meaningless and nothing I do will ever matter!!! Okay, good. I like to get that out of the way early.

Dick From The Internet

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Dick From The Internet - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 19, 2015's comic on:


Tags #internet, #comment, #jerk, #racism, #misconstrue, #social media, #technology

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Dilbert: An Elbonian start-up invented a new kind of computer mouse. Coworker: Wait until I tell the world that you compared Elbonians to mice, you racists! Hi, I'm Dick, from the Internet. Wally: We're familiar with your work.

Wally And Gender Balance

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Wally And Gender Balance - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 29, 2015's comic on:


Tags #career, #Advice, #gender, #technology

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Boss: What did you say to my daughter's class about stem careers? Wally: I told the boys to pursue restaurant work because it's a better way to meet women. Boss: That's messed up. Wally: You said you want gender balance, and now you have it.

Just A Guy In A Box

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Just A Guy In A Box - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 20, 2016's comic on:


Tags #existentialism, #existence, #value, #work, #use, #useful, #change

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Dilbert: I like to think the work I'm doing here will change the world. Boss: Your project didn't get funded because Carol forgot to put a meeting on my calendar. Dilbert: There is, however, a non-zero chance that I"m just a guy sitting in a box.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 17, 2016's comic on:


Tags #sexism, #sexist, #misogyny, #conversation, #talking

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Alice: You give Wally your full attention when he talks, but not me. You hang on every word the man says. But if I try to talk, you act distracted in five seconds. Wally gets more eye contact, too. You don't even look at me half the time I'm talking. Deep down, in your DNA, you know you are a sexist because you don't take me seriously when I speak to you. There is no other explanation, so don't insult me by trying. Dilbert: I give both of you the same amount of attention, but you spread it over more words. Alice: I hate both of you. Dilbert: Did I play that wrong? Wally: Yup.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 24, 2016's comic on:


Tags #gestures, #etiquette, #male, #Men, #masculinity, #social norms

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Dilbert: I never know the right time to high-five. I feel as if I should automatically know, like a male instinct. For example, when do you initiate a high-five and when do you simply yell "woo-hoo?" Those situations look the same to me. What's my problem? Alice: So many things. But in this specific case, the problem is your total lack of masculinity. Dilbert: High-five?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 20, 2016's comic on:


Tags #technology, #coding, #code, #control, #efficiency, #purpose, #job, #red tape, #business

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Mordac: Step away from that open source code! Dilbert: Why? Mordac: Because I am Mordac, The Preventer of All Efficient Solutions in the Information Technology Realm. Dilbert: That isn't an actual job. Mordac: I was hoping it was. I lost the file with my job description. That was five years ago. I've been winging it since then. My parents taught me that I could be anything I wanted to be. And I wanted to be this. So don't use that code! Dilbert: Not even when you turn around?

When Does The Motivation Start

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When Does The Motivation Start - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 07, 2016's comic on:


Tags #effective, #effectiveness, #executives, #motivation, #eric scott

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Dilbert: In the meeting, you said you are the best at motivating. I was wondering when you plan to start, because I could use some motivation. CEO: I've been doing it for five years. Dilbert: At work?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 10, 2016's comic on:


Tags #communication, #managers, #training, #obstacle, #laziness

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Dilbert: Can I take a class to improve my communication skills? Boss: What are you talking about? Dilbert: I want to take a class that teaches me how to communicate better. Boss: I don't understand what you're asking me. Dilbert: I am asking permission to take a class to help me communicate better. Boss: I see your lips moving but I can't figure out what you're asking. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! There's no way to get there from here! Boss: I'm glad I took that management class on how to not listen. It already paid off.