Garbage Man Comic Strips - Page 59

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View 581 - 590 results for garbage man comic strips. Discover the best "Garbage Man" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags don't know cobol, elbonia, imaginary keyboard, no computers, teach cobol

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Caption: Somewhere in Elbonia. Dilbert stands waist high in snow holding his briefcase. Two Elbonians in big hats and long beards stand across from him. Dilbert says, "I've been sent to teach you cobol." Elbonian man says, "We don't have any computers." Dilbert says, "That's okay. I don't know cobol." Dilbert and the two Elbonians pretend to type on imaginary keyboards. Dilbert says, "...And if you had a keyboard, you would od this." Elbonian says, "Oops.. how do I delete?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags teaches cobol, elbonia, y2k, year 2000 problem, four day class, cabbge, class dismissed

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Caption: Dilbert teaches Cobol in Elbonia. Dilbert stands in waist high snow in fron of two Elbonians. Dilbert says, "...And that's how you fix your "Year 2000" problem." Dilbert says, "This concludes my four-day class. Are there any questions." Elbonian man 1 says, "What's a year?" Elbonian man 2 says, "And is cobol a kind of cabbage or what?" Dilbert says, "Class dismissed."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags newest hore, team member, headless suit, meetings, never fire, bad decsion, head is in jar

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The Boss stands with his arm around a headless man. Alice sits at her computer. The Boss says, "Alice, meet the newest member of our team." The Boss says, "I hired him myself. That means I can never fire him; it would look like I made a bad decision." The Boss says, "Microsoft hired his head. It's in a jar in Redmond." Alice says, "And we got the part that goes to meetings."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new guy, name, wallet, hunts for wallet, appears like hug

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Alice stands in her cubicle with the headless man. Alice says, "If we're going to work together, I should know your name." Alice says, "Let's see if you have a wallet with some identification." Alice huge the headless man, her hands in his back pockets. Wally walks by. Wally says, "Geez, Alice, could you let the new guy settle in first?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags alice, drivers license, ed les mann, edward mann, headless man, name, new hire, office

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Wally and Alice stand with the headless man. Alice looks at his wallet. Alice says, "According to his driver's license, the new guy's name is Edward Mann." Wally says, "Is his middle name Lester?" Alice says, "How did you know that?" Wally says, "What we have here is an Ed Les Mann."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new hire, not working, no head, headless man, made mistake hiring, fired, insubordination

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Dilbert walks up to the Boss. Dilbert guides the headless man by the collar. Dilbert says, "The new guy isn't working out." The Boss says, "Why not?" Dilbert says, "Maybe because he has no head." The Boss frowns. The Boss says,"So, you think that I made a mistake hiring him?" Dilbert says, "Um... no. But the new guy thinks so." The boss shakes his fists. The Boss says, "Then he's fired for insubordination."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dogcart the consultant, target market, gullible moron, commercials, sincere actor

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Caption: Dogbert the consultant. Dogbert stands on the conference table. Dogbert holds a pointer. Dogbert says, "Our target market is the gullible moron segment." Dogbert points at a television. Dogbert says, "Our commercials will feature an actor who seems sincere." The actor on the TV says, "I care about the rain forest... and you." A couple sits on the couch and watches TV. The voice from the television says, "I like kittens... and you." The man says, "Wow.. we made it into his top two."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags unicornitis, cell normalizer, dna sample, genius garbageman

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The Garbage man throws garbage into his truck. The garbage man sees Dilbert who is wearing a coat and has a unicorn horn growing out of his forehead. The Grabage Man says, "Looks like someone has a bad case of unicornitis." The Grabage Man says, "I've got a pre-horn sample of your DNA in the truck. I could fix you up with my cell normalizer." Dilbert says, "Why do you have my DNA in your truck?" The Garbage man wears goggles and holds a ray gun. The Grabage Man says, "It's for exactly this sort of situation."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags microsoft headquarters, misspelled word, spell checking software, market power, new word industry

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Caption: "Microsoft Headquarters" A preppy man stands in front of a large desk. The person behind the desk (Bill Gates) can't be seen. Preppy man says, "We misspelled a word in our spellchecking software." Gates says, "You know what to do." Preppy man says, "Um.. use our market power to make the new word an industry standard?" Bill Gates says, "And....?" Preppy man says, "Kill myself as an example to others?" Gates says, "In our booth at "Comdex"."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags radio to work, alice, breaks radio, sound of breaking

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A man peers into Alice's cubicle. He holds a radio. He says, "Hey, Alice, I brought my radio to work. You can hear it from your cubicle too." The man says, "Is there anything in particular that you want to hear?" Alice says, "Yes, ther is." Dilber looks suprise as Bam sounds come from Alice's cubicle and radio parts fly.