Search Results for "long story"

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 11, 1999's comic on:


Tags #wally report, #hair grow long, #ponytail, #artistic side, #collect coffee mugs, #meeting, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally, Dilbert and the boss sit in a meeting. Wally's hair shoots up on either side of his bald spot. Wally says, "In this week's "Wally Report, " I've decided to let my hair grow long in the back." Wally says, "Eventually, I'll put it in a ponytail to show I have an artistic side." The boss says, "What's your artitstic side?" Wally says, "I collect coffee mugs."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 13, 1999's comic on:


Tags #false humility, #week, #without using, #experience joy, #long week

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert eats chips at home. Dogbert says, "Do you think that I have too much false humility?" Dilbert says, "Try going a week withou using any false humilty, so I can see the differrnce" Dogbert wears a crown and stands over Dilber who lies under the covers in bed. Dogbert says, "Wake up, you piece of fetid carp, and experiance the joy of knowing Dogbert!!!" Dilbert thinks, "This could be a long week."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 18, 1999's comic on:


Tags #nice woman, #venting, #phone number, #sounds nocer, #insulted, #descent story, #Dilbert, #brutal truth

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is at a party. A woman says, "And then I said, "How am I supposed to do all that?" then I glared at her." Dilbert says, "Do you have that woman's phone number? She sounds nicer than you." Dilbert walks and thinks, "I don't see why it's MY fault she can't tell a decent story."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 24, 1999's comic on:


Tags #million dollars, #call bluff, #going now, #long debate

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his robe, he eats breakfast and reads the newspaper. Dogbert says, "I'll give you a million dollars if you go to work like that." Dilbert stands up and says, "I'll call your bluff. I'm doing it. I'm going right now!" Dogbert says, "Go ahead!" Dogbert reads the paper and thinks, "Tonight I expect a long debate over the exact definition of "go to work like that."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 31, 1999's comic on:


Tags #story ever end, #purchase silence, #fist of death, #two warning system

View Transcript

Transcript

Ted, Alice and Wally sit in a meeting. Ted says, "But then I.." Alice taps Ted on the shoulder and says, "Excuse me." Alice says, "Does your story EVER end? Or must I purchase your silence with my fist of death?" Alice walks out of the meeting with Ted's still stuck to her arm. Alice says, "I might have to go to a two-warning system."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 03, 1999's comic on:


Tags #website, #webbish, #how long, #office, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss says to Dilbert, who is sitting at his computer: "The web site needs to be more webbish" The boss says to Dilbert: "But not to webbish" The boss says to Dilbert: "How long will that take?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 28, 1999's comic on:


Tags #executive mba program, #one hour long, #degree, #prestigious university

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss, Wally and Dilbert are sitting at a table. The boss says: "I signed up for an executive MBA program." The boss says: "It's one-hour long and I get a degree from a prestigious university." The boss says: "I'd better run. I'm already a half-hour late."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 27, 1998's comic on:


Tags #true story, #drowning in work, #build partition, #away from boss

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption reads: "Based on a true story." Carol sits in front of a pile of papers on her desk and says, "I'm drowning in work." She continues, "You have to do something." The Boss stands in front of her desk and says, "I could build a partition right here." Carol holds out her arms and says, "How will a partition help?" The Boss replies, "Carol, you shouldn't be afraid to try new things." He continues, "If it doesn't work, we'll try something else." Workment put up a partition in front of Carol's desk, which blocks her view of the Boss' door. Carol calls out over the partition, "Are you over there?" The Boss stands in the door to his office and thinks, "It works!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 03, 2000's comic on:


Tags #fake disability claim, #disabled, #hard to believe, #note from doctor, #obvious, #long time

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says to Dilbert as he pours himself a cup of coffee in the break room, "I'm thinking about going out on a fake disability claim." Wally and Dilbert are walking with a cup of coffee in hand. Wally goes on to say, "Do you think anyone will believe I'm disabled?" Dilbert replies sarcastically to himself without speaking, "It's hard to believe you're not." Wally enters The Boss' office and asks, "Do you need a note from my doctor?" The Boss replies sarcastically unenthused, "No, it's been obvious for a long time."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 12, 2001's comic on:


Tags #motivation fairy, #rewarding, #blurry vision, #long hors, #no raises, #no cubicle, #hair coming out, #wally fairy

View Transcript

Transcript

THE MOTIVATION FAIRY: The Fairy is sitting on top of Wally's computer monitor. Wally says, "It seems like your job isn't very rewarding." The Fairy, rubbing an eye, says, "Vision getting blurry." Wally says, "Long hours. No raises. No cubicle." The Fairy says, "Hair coming out in clumps." Wally watches as the Fairy flies away. The Fairy, looking exactly like Wally, with glasses and an almost bald head, says, "He's good. He's very good."