Lose Decoy Comic Strips - Page 6
84 Results for Lose Decoy
View 51 - 60 results for lose decoy comic strips. Discover the best "Lose Decoy" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share May 03, 2006's comic on:
CHIPS "Hello Dogbert. I am here to persuade you to give your billions to third world countries." "If guilt does not work, I am prepared to wrestle you for it." "How's your decoy working out?" "He's got Bono in a headlock."
Share June 15, 2007's comic on:
The Boss: Run a simulation of our productivity if we lost half our workforce to a pandemic. Dilbert: "Should I assume we lose the productive people or the people who ask other people to run pandemic simulations?" The Boss: "Try both ways?" Dilbert: "Okay. I'm done."
Share January 04, 2007's comic on:
The Boss: My doctor says it will be easier if I diet with a buddy. Do you want in on this? Tina: Good lord. I think I just developed an eating disorder! The Boss: They say the first 20 pounds are the easiest. Tina: NOT HELPING!"
Share March 16, 2007's comic on:
"We have a squatter problem." "We must make our empty cubicles appear occupied or else we'll lose them to other departments." "When we're done hosing our own company, can we start hosing the competition?" "Our customers are next."
Share July 20, 2010's comic on:
The Boss says, "I wouldn't worry about losing your job after the merger." Dilbert says, "Because you put in a good word for me?" The Boss says, "No, it's more of an observation that I don't worry about other people's jobs."
Share July 21, 2010's comic on:
The Boss says, "The people buying our company don't know that your project exists." The Boss says, "And you're not allowed to talk to anyone over there. But don't lose hope." The Boss says, "I'm working hard to upgrade your status from nonexistent to unimportant."
Share August 12, 2010's comic on:
The Boss says, "I asked my dentist to put vampire tips on my incisors so I'd be more intimidating." The Boss says, "Here comes Alice. Watch me put the fear into her." Alice says, "You need to lose a few pounds to pull of the vampire look. This is more of a walrus vibe."
Share September 14, 2008's comic on:
The Boss says, "We have a little problem with our new cell phone product." "It gives off a form of radiation that has a negative effect on the user." Dilbert says, "How bad is it?" The Boss says, "Well, it makes your head turn red, and you lose weight." A person says, "Hey, what is up with our new cell phone? I feel different." A janitor says, "Can I borrow your friend?" The Boss says, "I don't see why not." The person says, "AAAIII!!!" GLUB GLUB GLUB The Boss says, "Anyway, see if you can put a positive spin on that."
Share July 05, 2009's comic on:
Dilbert says, "I'm worried that I won't get a raise this year." The boss says, "You shouldn't worry about that." The boss says, "You should worry that you might lose your job in the next round of layoffs." Dilbert says, "I should worry about that???" The boss says, "Well...probably not." The boss says, "It makes more sense to worry about the entire company going out of business." The boss says, "And that's nothing if the global economy collapses." The boss says, "Maybe you should worry that the only viable livelihood of the future invokes cannibalism." Dogbert says, "Are you still worried about not getting a raise?" Dilbert says, "Not so much."