Despite Pressure Comic Strips - Page 6
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61 Results for Despite Pressure
View 51 - 60 results for despite pressure comic strips. Discover the best "Despite Pressure" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday August 08,
2010
Tags #favor, #ask, #phone ring, #children, #bogeyman, #mailman, #angry, #Family
Transcript
Dilbert says, "Carol, would you?" Carol says, "Here's an interesting experiment?" Carol says, "Watch what happens to your blood pressure when I take this call and make you wait." Carol says, "Yeah? What's the problem now?" Carol says, "Tell your brother I said to stop biting the ehads off your dolls." Carol says, "Uh-huh... well, if the man was wearing a postal uniform, he wasn't the bogeyman." Carol says, "You did what to him?" Carol says, "Listen carefully. I want you to tear up the carpet in the fancy bathroom..." Dilbert says, "I can come back."
Sunday June 27,
2004
Tags #engineers, #office, #name, #zinger, #introductions, #invisible, #resentful
Transcript
Why its great to be an engineer Hi Dilbert. Dilbert: Hi...there. He doesn't remember my name. Say it! Say my name! Hey dilbert. Now he'll be forced to introduce me, her- her. Alice: Am I interupting anything? dilbert: no Its awkward for you now. HA HA! squirm, you name forgetter. The pressure too introduce me must be killing you . HAHA! Dilbert: Do you have the new software specs? Alice: follow me. Alice: who was that guy? Dilbert: What guy?
Sunday July 20,
2003
Tags #functions to outsorce, #dont do well, #management, #sales, #quality control, #core competenece, #brown table startegy, #business
Transcript
Dilbert points to a slide and says, "As requested, I put together a list of functions we should outsource." Dilbert continues, "I limited my list to things we don't do well." The Boss and Wally listen as Dilbert's voice continues, "Marketing, quality control, engineering, finance, human resources, and customer support." Dilbert says, "That leaves us with our core competence..." Dilbert continues, "... Sitting around a brown table." Dilbert says, "And, of course, our ability to speak honestly without fear of retribution." The Boss says, "You will never get another raise as long as I'm alive." Dilbert responds, "Well, that puts a lot of pressure on the brown table strategy."
Thursday January 02,
2014
Tags #managers & supervisors, #public speaking, #heros journey, #power point, #pointed haired monster, #business
Transcript
Boss: Experts say you should format your presentation like a "Hero's Journey." Presentation: Eventually, the plucky engineer finished his PowerPoint slides despite interference from a pointy-haired monster. Boss: Experts never warn you about that part.
Tuesday May 20,
2014
Tags #crime victims, #embarrassment, #lost money, #phishing scam, #questioning support, #stifle laugh
Transcript
Boss; I lost all of my money to a phishing scam. Catbert: Must... stifle... laugh. Mmmph! Pressure is building. Must contain... \\ Boss: Are you being supportive? I can't tell. Catbert: Mmmph!
Saturday April 18,
2015
Wally Presents His Idea
Tags #ideas, #inventions, #thinking, #coffee, #mug, #decisions, #peer pressure, #independent thought
Transcript
Wally: I invented a coffee mug with two handles. It works from any angle of approach, accommodates larger payloads, and has handle redundancy. Alice: I can honestly say it is your best idea yet. Boss: If Alice likes it...
Wednesday August 12,
2015
Tell Everyone You Are Writing A Novel
Tags #writer, #reputation, #writing, #novel, #peer pressure, #motivation, #frustration, #writers block
Transcript
Dilbert: I'm telling everyone I'm writing a novel. That way I can leverage the invisible hand of social influence to motivate me for the next year. Alice: Have you written anything yet? Dilbert: Stop badgering me!!!
Tuesday January 03,
2017
Technical Debt
Tags #deadline, #stress, #pressure, #coding, #programmer, #mistake, #technology
Transcript
Boss: Did you finish the software yet? Dilbert: No, I'm still paying off the technical debt from the last programmer you rushed. Boss: I don't know what that means. Dilbert: Well, that explains a lot.
Thursday June 01,
2017
Alice Tries To Be Interesting
Wednesday December 27,
2017
Winning Design Awards
Tags #design, #fragile, #cell phone, #crack, #screen, #evil, #technology
Transcript
Boss: 100 percent of our smartphone buyers dropped and broke their phones within one minute of unboxing them. Despite our slippery materials and brittle design, customers blamed themselves. And we won seven prestigious design awards. CEO: Yes!