Haven't Done Anything Comic Strips - Page 6
792 Results for Haven't Done Anything
View 51 - 60 results for haven't done anything comic strips. Discover the best "Haven't Done Anything" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share May 31, 2000's comic on:
The Boss walks into Wally's office with a notepad. He says, "I'm documenting everything you do so I can easily fire you someday." The Boss continues to stand behind Wally. The Boss says, "Maybe you could call me if you do anything." Wally says, "Leave it here and I'll fill it out for you."
Share December 25, 2000's comic on:
As Dilbert knocks at his door, The Boss thinks, "I must clear my mind of all thoughts." The Boss says, "At the end of the day we'll be in a market space on a going forward basis." The Boss says, "Om... Om... Page..." Dilbert says, "I'll come back when you're done practicing being useless."
Share June 12, 2001's comic on:
Dilbert is walking out of the office with his briefcase and his jacket on. The Boss looks at his watch and says, "Leaving at seven?" Dilbert turns and replies, "All of my work is done." The Boss replies, "Then get some more work." Dilbert says, "That would make my life an exercise in futility." The Boss replies, "Exercise is good for you."
Share June 28, 2001's comic on:
The Boss sits at the conference table next to Dilbert and Wally. The Boss says, "We need to do more with less." Wally raises his hand and says, "I propose that we work smarter while broadening our focus." The Boss says, "Wally, that doesn't mean anything." Wally replies, "Well, excuse my leadership."
Share October 05, 2001's comic on:
Headline: Six Sigma Consultant. Dogbert is standing in front of a room. He says, "All of you are selfish and dimwitted but don't worry." Dogbert continues, "I'll teach you a process that will bog you down in meetings so you can't hurt anything." Asok panics and exclaims, "I can't move my arms!" The rest of the class is asleep.
Share January 17, 2002's comic on:
Headline: Sales Training. A speaker says, "A trained salesperson can sell anything to anyone." The speaker continues, "I will prove it by selling this roadkill to one of you for a thousand dollars." Dilbert returns home with roadkill on his head. Dogbert asks, "Um.. How was your class?" Dilbert responds, "I got a hat!"
Share April 19, 2002's comic on:
Dilbert asks a business associate, "Can you get this done in thirty days?" The business associate replies, "Yes, absolutely." The business associate continues, "We'll just travel faster than light to a black hole and discover a doorway in time." Dilbert replies, "That sounds iffy." The business associate says, "Excuse me for being flexible."
Share December 09, 2003's comic on:
Dogbert: "It's nice to be retired. I'll do a-a-anything I want to do all day long." "I guess you'll be banging your head against a wall today, trying to earn money for the social infrastructure." Dilbert: "Do you ever feel guilty?" Dogbert: "Is it a warm, tingly sensation that makes you wag?"
Share January 08, 2004's comic on:
"Ted, you're going to experience an involuntary separation from payroll." "I'm fired." "No-o-o-o. It's just that you won't be part of the payroll system." "And you're not allowed to touch anything."
Share February 02, 2004's comic on:
The Boss: Your project is my top priority. Tell me everything that I need to know. In so bored...cant...stay...awake. Dilbert: I haven't started talking yet. The Boss: Int gets worse??! Dilbert: oo okay