2021 Comic Strips - Page 6
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Character
Thursday February 18,
2021
Dogbert Gets Greenland
Tags stock market, business, technology, stock, greenland, sale, mercenary, army, apple, bitcoin
Transcript
dilbert: wow. my apple stock just went up 1.5%. dogbert: i sold all of my bitcoin to acquire greenland. dilbert: i didn't know it was for sale. dogbert: it wasn't, but luckily a mercenary army was.
Friday February 19,
2021
Wally's Best Idea
Tags managers & supervisors, business, lack, accomplishments, best, idea, career, interruption, finish, sarcasm
Transcript
boss: wally, do you have a minute to talk about your total lack of accomplishments? wally yelling: gaaa!!! i just had the best idea of my career, and your interruption made me forget it! boss: but no accomplishments until now? wally: i'm a strong finisher.
Saturday February 20,
2021
Tricking Employees
Tags managers & supervisors, sarcasm, reward, business, performance, punish, good, bad, work, tricking, employment
Transcript
catbert to boss: you've tried rewarding good performance and punishing bad. but have you tried tricking employees into working hard? boss: no, can you teach me? catbert to asok: remember, hard work is its own reward. asok: is it?
Sunday March 07,
2021
Fired For Social Media
Tags social media, business, technology, employment, fire, offensive, bad, people, twitter, issues, context, sides, associate, monsters
Transcript
boss: dilbert: i need to fire you for your social media activities. dilbert: did i say something offensive? boss: i'm getting reports that you follow bad people on twitter. dilbert: i follow people on both sides of every issue so i can see the full context. boss: that might sound good on paper, but half of the people you follow are monsters of one sort or another. dilbert: isn't it obvious that enforcing this kind of standard can only lead in a bad direction. boss: no, i don't see that at all. all i see is that you associate with people who are monsters. ceo to boss: i'm getting reports that you follow dilbert on twitter.
Monday February 22,
2021
Wally And The Big Picture
Tags business, office workers, sarcasm, big picture, fact check, meeting, finish, donut, beat
Transcript
wally: the reason i'm here is to help you look at the big picture. dilbert: i'll need a fact-check on that. i think you stayed over from the last meeting to finish your donut. wally eating a donut: it seems you beat me to the big picture.
Tuesday February 23,
2021
Simulation Nonsense
Tags business, computer, computer software, days, fast, nonsense, ruin, simulation, technology, upgrade, coffee
Transcript
tina: it feels as if the days are going by faster lately. dilbert: that's because we're a computer simulation that just got a software upgrade. tina: there's really nothing you can't ruin with that nonsense, is there? dilbert: i hear that a lot.
Wednesday February 24,
2021
You Make Luck
Tags business, technology, luck, wisdom, rewiring, super, employee, double, workload, brain, rewire, monster
Transcript
boss: remember, asok, you don't find luck, you go out and make it. asok yelling and waving arms: i feel your wisdom rewiring my brain and turning me into a super-employee! boss: it usually doesn't work this fast. asok: please double my workload, you beautiful monster!
Thursday February 25,
2021
Worst Place To Work
Tags barrel, best, business, dead, employees, employment, place, publication, squirrels, technology, trade, work, sarcasm
Transcript
boss in board room: a trade publication ranked us dead last on their list of "best places to work." the review says, "employees say working there is like eating a barrel of dead squirrels." boss: could have been worse. dilbert: only for the squirrels.
Friday February 26,
2021
Who Are They
Tags business, managers & supervisors, job, impossible, laptop, coffee, correct, learn
Transcript
wally: they said it couldn't be done. boss: but you did it? wally: no, it turns out they're usually right. boss: who are "they," and why am i just learning this? wally: you sound like me last week.
Saturday February 27,
2021
Feedback To Boss
Tags business, managers & supervisors, feedback, performance, boss, trap, constructive, criticism, perfect, almost, anger, honest
Transcript
boss: ted, i want your honest feedback on how i'm doing as your boss. ted: this feels like a trap. boss: not at all! i love constructive criticism! ted: i think you're almost perfect. boss yelling: almost?


