Catbert Hr Driector Comic Strips - Page 6

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638 Results for Catbert Hr Driector

View 51 - 60 results for catbert hr driector comic strips. Discover the best "Catbert Hr Driector" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 24, 1997's comic on:


Tags #Catbert, #evil hr director, #discriminated against, #family emergencies, #ratted out boss, #family friendly policy, #love family

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Alice sits in a chair and Catbert sits on a couch. Alice says, "I'm being discriminated against because I take time off for family emergencies." Catbert replies, "I'll handle this by telling your boss that you ratted him out to the Director of Human Resources." Alice says, "I thought we had a 'Family Friendly' policy." Catbert says, "The key word is FRIENDLY. You've been acting as if you LOVE your family."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 16, 1997's comic on:


Tags #Catbert, #evil hr director, #new policy, #official company font, #obscure, #impractical font, #elbonia, #elbonian font

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Catbert stands at his desk and types, "New policy: all company documents MUST use the official company font . . ." Catbert purrs and thinks, "Let's see . . . What would be the most obscure and impractical font imaginable?" The caption says, "Somewhere in Elbonia." Dilbert tells an Elbonian, "I understand I can get the Elbonian font software from you." The man replies, "Yep. Unless you need consonants for some reason."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 22, 1997's comic on:


Tags #Catbert, #evil, #executed, #hr driector, #ill be fired, #internet, #non buiness, #personal thoughts, #sadistic policies, #senseless, #warning, #mass email, #technology

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Catbert stands at his desk and types, "Any employee who uses the Internet for non-business purposes will be fired." Catbert types, "And any employee who sits in a company chair while having a personal thought will be executed by security." Catbert smiles and thinks, "The great thing about senseless, sadistic policies is that they don't require a lot of explanation."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 18, 1997's comic on:


Tags #Catbert, #evil hr director, #complaints, #unnecessary, #meetings, #Family, #ridiculous

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Tina sits across from Catbert's desk. Catbert says, "People are complaining that you schedule unnecessary meetings as a substitute for a family." Tina replies, "That's ridiculous! Come to my next meeting and see for yourself." Catbert says, "Okay, I will." Tina tells Dilbert, "I got us a family cat. How was your day, dear?" Dilbert leans on his desk and sobs.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 23, 1997's comic on:


Tags #Catbert, #evil, #hr director, #new policy, #travel separate flights, #dangerous hobbies

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Catbert stands on the back of Wally's chair. He says, "New policy: Key employees must travel on separate flights to reduce risk." Catbert sits on Wally's head and continues, "Other employees, such as Wally, are encouraged to take up dangerous hobbies." Wally sits at a table with Alice and Dilbert eating lunch. Wally says, "I've noticed that when a new policy mentions me by name, it's never a good thing."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 23, 1997's comic on:


Tags #Catbert, #evil hr director, #abuse people, #reduce turnover, #job titles, #convicted felon

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Catbert, the Evil H.R. Director, sits at his desk. He thinks, "I can't abuse people if they quit the company. I'd better find a way to reduce turnover." Catbert types into his PC, "All job titles will be changed as follows..." Wally stares at his computer screen and says, "My new title is... "Convicted Felon." Dilbert says, "That's look good on the ol' resume."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 12, 1997's comic on:


Tags #Catbert, #evil director, #clean desk policy, #lick clean, #spineless, #stupid

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Catbert: Evil H.R. Director Catbert stands atop Wally's computer monitor and waves a new policy sheet in Wally's face. "Here's the new 'clean desk' policy, Wally." Wally reads from the sheet, "Employees must lick their workplaces clean at the end of each business day." Wally stands in the doorway to the Boss's office. He says, "Do they seriously think we're this spineless and stupid?" The Boss responds, "Ahm nah chanthing it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 25, 1997's comic on:


Tags #Catbert, #evil director, #human resources, #deadlines, #embarrassing, #fuzzy, #laughed, #embarrasing, #business

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Catbert peers over the cubicle wall at Alice and says, "Alice you have to use your vacation time or you'll lose it." Alice grimaces as Catbert says, "But if you take time off, you'll miss your deadlines." Catbert laughs wickedly. Catbert walks away, his normally smooth fur is puffed out. Catbert thinks, "This is embarrassing. I laughed myself fuzzy."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 21, 1997's comic on:


Tags #bad clothes, #casula clothes, #Catbert, #evil hr director, #explain logic, #hawaiian shirt, #impact on earnings, #one casual day

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Catbert sits at his computer, prring as he types. He thinks, "Another evil policy. I'm a happy cat." The Boss reads from a memo and says, "Casual clothes will not be allowed this Friday..." The Boss continues, "...Because we had Hawaiian shirt day on Wednesday." Everyone has question marks floating above their heads. Alice says, "Um... can you explain the logic here?" The Boss says, "We're only allowed one casual day per week." Wally says, "Why?" The Boss says, "If we had TWO casual days, obviously it would have an impact on earnings." Wally says, "Does stupidity have an impact on our earnings, too, or just bad clothes?" The Boss says, "We're only sure about bad clothes." Dilbert says, "Alice, you're killing us with that outfit." Alice glares.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 19, 1997's comic on:


Tags #Catbert, #evil director, #human resources, #randomly selected, #drug test, #unlucky at work, #hair samples, #one whole eyebrow, #lost box, #business

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Catbert sits at his computer terminal. The monitor dispalys a picture of Wally, labeled Victims. Catbert thinks, "You're next." Catbert stands in Wally's cubicle and says, "Wally, you've been randomly selected for an employee drug test." Wally says, "Randomly? Why am I the only one who gets picked every week?!" Catbert says, "You're very unlucky at work. But I'm sure you compensate by being lucky at love." Catbert laughs a maniacal laugh. Catbert says, "Anyway... our new drug test uses hair samples." Catbert holds a little box and says, "To be safe, give me six hairs... and one whole eyebrow." Catbert walks off with his box, purring. He thinks, "I'll come back in an hour and says I lost the box."