Deadline Comic Strips - Page 6
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82 Results for Deadline
View 51 - 60 results for deadline comic strips. Discover the best "Deadline" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday October 20,
2016
Different Time Estimates
Tags quote, estimate, time, deadline, length, pessimism
Transcript
Boss: I'm getting wildly different estimates for how long it will take to write the software. Dilbert: Based on my experience, I say take the longest estimate and multiply it by three. Boss: Is experience exactly the same as pessimism? Dilbert: Experience is much worse.
Monday October 24,
2016
Mandatory Safety Meeting
Tags safety, catch-22, choosing, unsafe
Transcript
Boss: You have to go to a mandatory safety training class right now. Dilbert: Is it safe for me to miss the deadline you gave me for this assignment? Boss: No, you lose either way. Dilbert: Hmm. Maybe I could work all night from home then drive to work exhausted.
Tuesday October 25,
2016
Dilbert Falls Asleep At The Wheel
Tags safety, catch-22, fatigue, accident, driving
Transcript
Dilbert: I fell asleep at the wheel because I stayed up all night to meet your deadline. I had to work all night because you made me attend a mandatory safety meeting yesterday. But at least I got my work done on time. Boss: I forgot to tell you the meeting got moved to next week.
Monday November 14,
2016
Wally's Work Life Balance
Tags laziness, work ethic, excuse
Transcript
Wally: I can't do your urgent task because I'm on deadline for my boss. I can't meet your deadline because I have an urgent task from a co-worker. I finally figured out the whole "work-life balance" thing.
Monday November 28,
2016
World's Saddest Club
Monday December 19,
2016
Who's Turn To Lie
Tuesday December 20,
2016
Forgot To Go To Pre Meeting Corrected
Tags deception, lying, deadline, boss, executive
Transcript
CEO: Is the software finished as your boss promised me it would be? Dilbert: I forgot to go to the pre-meeting for this meeting, so I'll guess the answer is.. yes? CEO: Okay, keep up the good work! Dilbert: Thanks goodness he doesn't know what the truth even looks like.
Wednesday December 21,
2016
Won't Take No For An Answer
Tuesday January 03,
2017
Technical Debt
Tags deadline, stress, pressure, coding, programmer, mistake, technology
Transcript
Boss: Did you finish the software yet? Dilbert: No, I'm still paying off the technical debt from the last programmer you rushed. Boss: I don't know what that means. Dilbert: Well, that explains a lot.
Wednesday January 04,
2017
Ruining Dilbert's Flow
Tags stress, deadline, work load, multitask, compensation, money
Transcript
Boss: I'm giving you another software project to work on at the same time as your main project. Dilbert: That will ruin my flow. It will take too long to reset my brain when I switch between projects. Boss: Have you tried working longer hours without extra pay? Dilbert: Yes I have!


