Drink Kool Aid Comic Strips - Page 6

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View 51 - 60 results for drink kool aid comic strips. Discover the best "Drink Kool Aid" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #after work, #bar, #date, #drink, #false sense, #group activity, #other people, #safety, #scam, #show up, #suspicious, #trick, #trust

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Dilbert says, "Some of us are going for a drink after work. Would you like to join us?" A woman says, "Nice try, but I know how this scam works." The woman says, "You're trying to lull me into a false sense of activity with a group activity." The woman says, "But we both know the other people will mysteriously never show up." The woman says, "Then it's just you and me on what looks like a date." Dilbert says, "How many people do I have to invite before you believe some of them will show up?" The woman says, "Well, given the disparity in our levels of attractiveness, I'd say thirty-five." Dilbert says, "Can do." The woman says, "Not one other person showed?" Dilbert says, "I only invited women who are more suspicious than you."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #albanian makeover, #bald and chinless, #hat makes taller, #career helper, #minute to drink in, #vp of finance

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Wally says, "I got an Elbonian makeover. Now no one can tell I'm bald and chinless." Wally says, "The hat even makes me look taller. I think this will help my career." Wally says, "Take a minute to drink this in." An Elbonian says, "I just found my new VP of finance!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fear, #honesty, #panic, #reality, #worried, #first recession, #hopes and dreams dashed, #yank band aid

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Asok says, "This is my first recession. How worried should I be?" Wally says, "You'll be fine as long as you don't have any hopes and dreams." Asok says, "But I still have them." Wally says, "It's time to yank off that band-aid."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #budget, #coffee, #suggestion, #anger, #firing, #meeting, #business

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the boss says, "I need ideas on how we can cut spending." Wally says, bring back free coffee." the boss says, "That's the opposite of cutting spending." Wally says, "It seems that way if you're short sighted." Wally says, "When I buy my own coffee, I don't drink as much." Wally says, "That make me less alert and about half as productive." Wally says, "If you give me free coffee, you can fire Ted and come out ahead." Wally says, "I rest my case." The boss says, "I'm sorry Ted. Wally makes a compelling argument." zzz

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #taliban, #hearing, #lying, #emailing, #spam, #toilet

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Wally says, "If I don?t do what you ask me to do, it?s because my hearing aid fell in the toilet." The Boss says, "I didn't know you had a hearing problem." Wally says, "EH? WHAT? EH?" Wally says, "You could try e-mailing me, but I have my spam filter cranked up to "Taliban"."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #scope, #calibrated, #budget, #save money, #friend, #elrod, #shady, #tinker, #bad idea, #car, #bathrub, #drink, #relationships

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Dilbert says, "Our scope needs to be calibrated. Do we have a budget for that?" The Boss says, "We can save a few bucks by sending it to my friend, Elrod. He likes to tinker." Dilbert says, "Everything about that idea is bad." The Boss says, "You should see the car he made from a bathtub."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #party, #woman, #date, #hold drink, #invent, #shoulder phone, #old man's head, #soup, #bones, #scary, #arm out, #surprised, #run away, #scared, #Dogbert, #trick, #auto-answer, #kiss

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Dilbert says, "It's a shoulder phone shaped like an old man's head. I invented it myself." Phone says, "Let's make soup from her bones, just like the others!" Dilbert says, "I shouldn't have told Dogbert it has auto-answer." Phone says, "Kiss me! Now!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #work, #lazy, #update software, #computer, #reboot, #endless cycle, #drink coffee, #optimism, #past, #waste time, #technology, #business

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Wally says, "Every time I update my software, it tells me I have to reboot." Wally says, "And every time I reboot, I get another message to update something else. It's all I've been doing since October." The Boss says, "But you worked in September, right?" Wally says, "I admire your optimism about the past."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #rolling forecast, #worthless, #sarcasm, #meeting, #snork, #laugh, #drink coffee, #business

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The Boss says, "I've decided to move to a rolling forecast." Dilbert says, "So, the problem is that forecasts are worthless, and your solution is to do more of them?" Dilbert says, "If my sarcasm is a problem, I can solve that by doing more of it." Wally says, "SNORK"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #lose job, #merger, #worry, #good word, #recommendation, #drink coffee, #observation

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The Boss says, "I wouldn't worry about losing your job after the merger." Dilbert says, "Because you put in a good word for me?" The Boss says, "No, it's more of an observation that I don't worry about other people's jobs."