Live In Terminal Comic Strips - Page 6

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

149 Results for Live In Terminal

View 51 - 60 results for live in terminal comic strips. Discover the best "Live In Terminal" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #email chain letter, #will die, #curse of dogbert, #certain death, #curse, #turns into dogs

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok is sitting at his computer terminal and thinks, "Oh no! I got an e-mail chain letter. It says I'll die if I don't send it to ten more people." Asok thinks, "But if I forward the message, the Curse of Dogbert will be upon me." Asok looks like Dogbert, as do Alice and Wally (dog ears and dog nose). Asok says, "...So, I figured a curse is better than certain death, right?" Wally says, "Spank you very much." Alice puts her hands on her hips and looks angry.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Catbert, #evil hr directorm not enjoying job, #powerful anti depressant, #prescribe drugs, #illegal

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Catbert: Evil H.R. Director. Alice says to Catbert, "I'm not enjoying my job." Catbert hands Alice a bottle of pills and says, "Take this powerful anti- depressant drug for the rest of your life." Alice responds, "I didn't know H.R. could prescribe drugs." Catbert says, "I'd hate to live in a world where that was illegal." Alice reads the bottle aloud, "Boss-proof cap."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #accept transfer, #frozen asteroid, #surplussed, #map

View Transcript

Transcript

Bob tells Alice, "If I don't accept the transfer to a frozen asteroid, I'll be superplugged." Alice says, "Ted, let me show you something on this map." Alice points and asks, "See this tiny island?" Ted answers, "Yes." Alice says, "That's where the people who care live."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cubicle, #box, #explination, #work environment, #dilberts mother, #dilmom

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert's mom, "Someday I'd like to see your office." Dilbert responds, "It's a cubicle, Mom." Dilbert's mom asks, "What's a cubicle?" Dilbert responds, "Imagine the most beautiful place on Earth." Dilbert's mom replies, "Okay. I've got it." Dilbert says, "Now imagine you can never go there because you live in a box."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dogberts tech support, #software, #cat scan machine, #break room, #insert head, #trickster dogbert, #prnak, #cowoorker, #labor market, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption: Dogbert's Tech Support Dogbert on phone with Tech Support guy. Dogbert sitting at computer terminal with hand on mouse. Dogbert says, "Our software is perfect. The problem must be with you." Tech Support guy on phone with Dogbert. Dogbert continues, "Go to the cat scan machine in the break room and insert your head. I'll monitor you from here." Wally watches as Tech Support guy inserts his head into microwave. Tech Support guy says, "Do you see the problem?" Wally says, "I blame the tight labor market."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dogcarts tech support, #abuse, #slow internet, #records, #porn, #caused by porn

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption: Dogbert's Tech Support Dogbert at computer terminal speaking to employee on the phone. Dogbert says, "How may I abuse you today?" Employee responds, "The Internet is slow. What causes that?" Employee sitting at his terminal speaking to Dogbert on the phone. Dogbert says, "That can only be caused by you looking at porn." Dogbert says, "I'll need your name for our records." Dogbert hears a "Click" on the line.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #eliminate privacy, #dignity, #share hotel rooms, #business trips, #tandem showering policy

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption: Catbert: H.R. Director Catbert typing at computer terminal. Catbert types, "Consistent with our effort to eliminate privacy and dignity..." Dilbert at his computer terminal reading what Catbert is typing. Catbert's text reads, "...employees must share hotel rooms on all business trips." Catbert at his desk in front of his computer thinking, "After they get used to this, I'll introduce the tandem showering policy."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #share hotel rooms, #conference, #roomie, #agree to rules, #spoon on right, #sleep together, #buddies, #new rules, #cheap company

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert standing next to Wally, who's sitting at his computer terminal. Dilbert says, "Wally, as you know, employees must share hotel rooms at the conference..." Dilbert continues, "So I was wondering if you'd like to...you know...be my roomie." Wally responds, "Sure." Dilbert says, "We'll have to agree on some rules." Wally replies, "I can only spoon on my right."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #web pages, #urls, #replace urls, #uniform resource locators

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sitting at computer terminal while The Boss gripes, "I don't see why our web pages need URLs. Get rid of them." The Boss, in a unsure manner, says, "Did that make any sense?" Dilbert replies, "Yes, it's brilliant." Dilbert says, "Give me a month and I'll replace our URLs with uniform resource locators." The Boss clinches his fist and says, "Perfect."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #son-of_a_boss, #simple prodcut, #mom can use, #hamster, #simple, #dumb, #leave mom out, #physicist

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption: Son-of-a-Boss Son-of-a-Boss spaeking with Alice, who is sitting at her computer terminal. Son-of-a-Boss says, "You have to make our product so simple that my mom could use it." Alice turns around and says, "It's already so simple a hamster could use it. How much dumber is your mom?" Son-of-a-Boss responds, "Maybe we should leave my mom out of this." Alice says, "MY mom is a physicist."