Monkey Face Comic Strips - Page 6

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293 Results for Monkey Face

View 51 - 60 results for monkey face comic strips. Discover the best "Monkey Face" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 20, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #head, #Dogbert, #spin, #yergi, #elbonia, #elbonians, #visiting, #economy, #earns, #doctor, #year, #pair, #shoes, #philanthropist, #offered, #root, #buy, #man's, #dignity, #Kids, #meat

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Dilbert sits at his desk. He hears, "Ha ha! Now spin on your head! Ha ha ha!" Dilbert walks into the room and sees an Elbonian standing on his head. He asks Dogbert, "What's going on here?" Dogbert replies, "This is Yergi. He's visiting from Elbonia." Dogbert explains, "The economy in Elbonia is so bad he only earns three dollars a month as a doctor." Dogbert continues, "It takes a year to earn enough for a pair of shoes . . . It takes TWO years for a pound of meat." Dogbert continues, "Philanthropist that I am, I offered to give him an old boot if he would act like my trained monkey for a week." Dilbert scolds, "Dogbert! I can't believe you would buy this man's dignity for an old boot!" Yergi says, "I plan to tell the kids it's a pound of meat." Dogbert says, "Quiet, Bobo."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 19, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #elbonians, #leader, #rebel, #diplomat, #peace, #mission, #rock, #pig, #varnish, #clams, #break

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An Elbonian lies face down in the mud. Another Elbonian man says to Dilbert, "You crushed our leader. Now YOU must be the new rebel leader." Dilbert replies, "I'm a diplomat, on a peace mission." The Elbonian says, "A wise Elbonian once said 'In a race between a rock and a pig, don't varnish your clams.'" Dilbert says, "That's stupid." The Elbonian crosses his arms and asks, "What kind of diplomat are you??" Dilbert replies, "First day on the job . . . Gimme a break."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 02, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #bungee jump, #avoidable, #danger, #weight, #bungee, #cord, #underestimate, #hill, #man

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Dilbert sees a sign that says "Bungee Jump 10 dollars." He thinks, "It's the manly thing to do." Dilbert enters the office and says, "I'd like to expose myself to avoidable danger." A man says, "Sit right down." The man says, "I need to know your weight so I can adjust the bungee cord." The man says, "Be sure you don't under-estimate your weight or else your head will hit the ground like an over-ripe cantaloupe." Dilbert answers, "Seven hundred pounds." The man wraps a bungee cord around Dilbert's body and head. He says, "Count to three and jump." Dilbert and the man stand on a hill. Dilbert says, "I didn't know you could do this on a hill." The man kicks Dilbert. Dilbert lies face-down on the hill. He says, "Today, I am a man." The man says, "For a hundred bucks I'll pull you back."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 02, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #presentation, #elvis

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Dogbert sits on the hassock. Dilbert enters holding a piece of paper and says, "Dogbert, tell me if you think my illustration for tomorrow's presentation is clear." Dogbert looks at the illustration and says, "Ah, yes. You're saying the face of Elvis will appear on a credenza after being struck by lightning." Dilbert says, "That's supposed to be a video teleconference." Dogbert says, "I didn't know you could do that with a credenza."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 03, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #elvis, #art

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Dilbert stands next to an overhead projector. Dilbert puts a transparency on the projector and says, "Please excuse the artwork in this next diagram." Various people in the background say, "What's that? It looks like Elvis's face on a credenza! Ha ha ha! Or is it a Rorschach test??! Ha ha ha!" Dilbert says, "And in conclusion, I hate you all."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 10, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert

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Dilbert sits in his chair reading a book and Dogbert stands on the hassock holding a plate. Dogbert says, "You already own the 'Acorn Series' of Dogbert's Commemorative Plates . . ." Dogbert continues, "For a limited time you may also purchase my new issue: the 'French Guy With a Hat' series." Dogbert has drawn a face on the acorn. Dilbert says, "My acorn plates are missing." Dogbert sits on his pillow thinking, "Tomorrow I'll introduce my new series: 'Russian With French Hat.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 17, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #ratbert, #computer, #middle ages, #the plague

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Dilbert sits at his desk and Ratbert sits on the desk. Ratbert says, "Sometimes I think I'm not reaching my full potential as a rat." Dilbert replies, "You're right. In the Middle Ages, disease-carrying rats wiped out half of the human population of Europe." Ratbert says, "I think I've got a little temperature. Feel my forehead." Dilbert says, "Face it, your glory days are past."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 22, 1993's comic on:


Tags #lawyer, #Dogbert, #lawsuit

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Dogbert sits at a table with a lawyer. The lawyer says to Dogbert, "If you do not drop your class action suit, then you'll have to face ME in court." The lawyer continues, "And I've never lost a case." Dogbert says, "Then how do you know you wouldn't enjoy it." The man replies, "Well . . . I just wouldn't." Dogbert says, "Good argument."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 01, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #hospital, #doctor, #computer, #bed, #flu

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Dilbert sits on an examining table wearing only his underwear. He asks, "Is it the flu?" The doctor looks at a chart and says, "Hmm . . ." The doctor says, "I had the computer run an economic report on the market value of your organs." The doctor continues, "I could make thousands of dollars by selling your parts for transplants." The doctor continues, "Of course, this is all moot unless you die in my office while under my care." The doctor says, "But if I let you die from the flu then my malpractice insurance will go up again." The doctor continues, "But if you live I can continue to bill you for unnecessary tests." The doctor continues, "There's a slight economic advantage to keeping you alive . . . If you leave three pints of blood and do me a little favor." Back at home, Dilbert lies face down on the bed. He tells Dogbert, "Then I had to wax his Jeep with my clothes." Dogbert replies, "Apparently he didn't know what kind of fabrics you wear."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 08, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #co worker, #man, #attractive woman, #socializing, #dating

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Dilbert sees a co-worker whose hair stands straight up. Dilbert asks, "What's wrong with you?" The man replies, "I have A.W.S." Dilbert asks, "You have 'Attractive Woman Syndrome' HERE??" The man replies, "She was just hired." The man shouts, "Run!" The Boss approaches and says, "Dilbert, I'd like you to meet Liz." Dilbert thinks, "Uh-oh . . . My metabolism is increasing. My brain is suppressing what little social skills I have." The woman says, "Hi." Dilbert extends his hand and says, "It's a pleasure to meet me. I hope you never find a live turtle in your soup." Sweat flies off Dilbert's forehead. Dilbert covers his face with a piece of paper and thinks, "Aaagh! What was that supposed to mean??" Liz looks scared. The paper sticks to Dilbert's face and he thinks, "Oh great . . . The correction fluid wasn't dry. It's stuck to my eyebrows." Dilbert arrives at home with the document still stuck to his face. He asks Dogbert, "What can I do to stop frightening attractive women?" Dogbert replies, "That mask is a step in the right direction."