Potential Client Comic Strips - Page 6

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90 Results for Potential Client

View 51 - 60 results for potential client comic strips. Discover the best "Potential Client" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 15, 2004's comic on:


Tags #poison waffles, #stock, #insider trading, #conflicts of interest, #worthwhile, #banking business

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"I'll recommend your stock to the public, but first I need some conflicts of interest to make it worthwhile." "For example, I'll need to get your investment banking business." "Okay." "And you need to merge with my other client that makes poison waffles." "Okay."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 22, 2004's comic on:


Tags #objectives are vague, #unmeasurable, #not inspired, #achieve full ptential, #bad job

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"I am concerned because my objectivess are vague and unmeasurable." "As a result, I am not inspired to achieve my full potential... and... um..." "Did I just say I'm doing a bad job and ask you to punish me?" "That's what I heard."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 07, 2005's comic on:


Tags #attorney, #contact, #cubicle opened, #dividing up workspace, #eyebrows, #my client, #prove, #naked, #got him for everything, #legal

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"A cubicle vacancy opened up, so I'll be moving out of here." "My attorney will contac you about dividing up our workspace property." "Next, can you proves that you have both eyebrows before you met my client?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 03, 2005's comic on:


Tags #my hat, #can't see, #perfect for job, #reverse psychology, #potentail jumpers

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"I understand that you have an opening for a negotiator who deals with potential jumpers." "I can't see you because my hat is in the way, but you sound perfect for the job." "Your reverse psychology didn't work." "What reverse psychology?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 22, 2005's comic on:


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"I'm an attorney. If my client is injured by this time machine, I will sue!" "I think you should consult with your client before being so belligerent."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 07, 2005's comic on:


Tags #dance club, #allow anyone, #screen potential customers, #dance moves, #incorporated air guitar

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I opened a dance club that's so exclusive I don't allow anyone in. "I personally screen every potential customer until I find a reason to exclude." "Have your dance moves ever incorporated the air guitar?" "Yes."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 25, 2006's comic on:


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"Welcome to Dogbert's accelerated sales training course." "Today you will learn how a person can simultaneously drink and golf." "What will we learn tomorrow?" "Tomorrow? What part of 'accelerated' is confusing you?" "As you know, the hard part about drinking and golfing is that they both require your hands." "That's why I invented the sportsman's beer muzzle." "Give this to your client and the sale will practically make itself." "Ooh!" "Ooh!" "Ooh!" "This ish the besht day of my life!" "I'll put you down for ten pallets of mouse pads."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 14, 2006's comic on:


Tags #congress, #lobbying, #money, #politicians, #Politics, #voting, #corruption, #enthusiasm

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Dogbert the Lobbyist Dogbert: Congressman, I will give you this bag of money if you vote for tax breaks for my client. Try to be less obvious than the last time. Congressman: Yes! I vote yes! Man: Smooth.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 23, 2006's comic on:


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"What the...? How can you be relaxed with so much work to do?" "Your mistake is taking pride in how much work you can complete." "You see, Alice, there's an infinite quantity of potential work." "But it's only possible to do a finite amount." "You have set yourself up for certain failure according to your own arbitrary standard." "By way of contrast, I take pride in not taking pride in my work." "I've already achieved my goal and it's not even lunch time yet." "Don't you need a new goal for after lunch?" "I'm aiming for a distended stomach."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 27, 2006's comic on:


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"Did you tell Asok to get our client a 'little bit pregnant'?" "Yes." "Well, he doesn't understand all of our American sayings." "I don't know what this is all about, but I'm in."