Strategic Asset Comic Strips - Page 6

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

55 Results for Strategic Asset

View 51 - 55 results for strategic asset comic strips. Discover the best "Strategic Asset" comics from Dilbert.com.

Mandatory Training

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Mandatory Training - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #avoidance, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #training

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You haven't finished the mandatory compliance training modules. Alice: I'm waiting for a strategic time to do them. Boss: Oh, okay. Want to go to lunch? Alice: I would love to, but I have training modules to do.

Meeting Ending Invention

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Meeting Ending Invention    - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #invent, #app, #application, #ring, #phone, #meeting, #strategic, #direction, #face mask

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i invented an app that makes your phone ring to get you out of meetings. boss: how does that fit our strategic direction? dilbert's phone: bing, bing, bing! dilbert walking away: i need to take this call.

Word Salad

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Word Salad   - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #argument, #implications, #long term, #ramifications, #strategic, #priorities, #word salad, #trigger, #cognitive, #dissonance, #business, #face mask

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: you think you made a good argument, but... you are failing to consider the overall implications of the long-term ramifications with regard to strategic priorities. dilbert: that big bowl of word salad suggests i triggered you into cognitive dissonance. boss: tuna carpet!

Astrology Filter

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Astrology Filter - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #apathy, #Astrology, #business, #incoherent, #sense, #strategic, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert looking at laptop: your strategic technology plan was incoherent. i had to run it through an astrology filter to make sense out of it. boss video conferencing: and? dilbert: it says you are "full of taurus" and your plan "is a cancer." boss: sounds right.

Taking Time Off

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Taking Time Off - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #video call, #vacation, #paid time off, #critical, #essential, #system, #migration, #kidding, #success, #zoom, #call, #valuable, #asset, #engagement

View Transcript

Transcript

boss and dilbert on video call. dilbert: is it okay if i take next week off? boss: are you kidding? we're in the most critical month of the system migration. you're essential to our succcess. all hands must be on deck. dilbert: really? it seems as if all i do is listen to other people say useless stuff on zoom calls. boss: my goodness, no! employees are our most valuable asset! we can't succeed unless we have 100% employee engagement. dilbert: i took all of last week off for vacation, and no one noticed. boss: next time, start with that.