Use Integration Comic Strips - Page 6

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View 51 - 60 results for use integration comic strips. Discover the best "Use Integration" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 14, 1992's comic on:


Tags #resources, #cow, #egg, #lobby, #counter, #lates, #vegetarians, #health, #link, #Food, #nutrition, #pyramid, #school, #Kids, #different, #learned

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A large man behind a desk says to two overweight men, "We must use all of the resources of the 'Cow and Egg' lobby to counter the latest threat from the vegetarians." The man continues, "Somehow they've managed to link food with health . . . They invented a 'nutrition pyramid' chart and got schools to use it . . ." A teacher points to a chart and says, "Kids, this is a little different from the way I learned it . . ." Meat, milk and beer are at the top of the pyramid and are labeled "bad." The next levels on the pyramid are gravel, bugs; beans, tofu; fruits, vegetables; bread, cereal, grains.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 03, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #strange, #dream, #nosebleed, #supressing, #memories, #abducted, #aliens, #hypnosis, #scorned

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Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert holds a pen and a pad of paper. Dogbert asks, "Have you ever had a strange dream or a nosebleed?" Dilbert replies, "Yes." Dogbert says, "It's clear that you're suppressing memories of being abducted by aliens. I can use hypnosis to get at those memories." Dilbert asks, "What if the hypnosis itself makes me think it happened when it didn't? I'll be scorned and ridiculed for life." Dogbert replies, "That's a risk I'm willing to take."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 09, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #general, #government, #u.f.o., #encounters, #Lose, #faith, #aliens, #abducting, #people, #helpless, #maintain, #confidence, #taxes, #citizens

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Dogbert and a man in a military uniform sit at the table. Dogbert says, "General, I don't understand why the government is trying to cover up all the U.F.O. encounters." The General replies, "People would lose faith in their government if they knew aliens were abducting people and we were helpless to stop them." Dogbert says, "So, to maintain confidence in the government, you use our taxes to kill the citizens who find out?" The General asks, "Is that so bad?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 10, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #aliens, #abductiving, #probe, #body, #cavities, #implant, #objects, #advanced, #medical, #research, #round, #pellet, #prober, #nose

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Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table. Dilbert says, "We can only speculate why aliens keep abducting people." Dilbert continues, "They often probe people's body cavities. Sometimes they implant small objects. It must be some form of highly advanced medical research." An alien says to another alien, "How about another round of 'Hide the Pellet?'" The other alien holds up an instrument and replies, "Okay. I can use my nose prober."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 28, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #natural, #mental, #peaks, #knowledge, #improve, #performance, #hourly, #temperature, #readings, #identify, #avoid

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Dogbert sits in a chair across from a man. Dogbert says, "Every person has natural daily rhythms of mental peaks and troughs. We can use this knowledge to improve your performance." Dogbert hands the man a thermometer and continues, "We use hourly body temperature readings to identify and avoid the troughs." As the man leans back in his chair and waves his arms, Dogbert writes, "One o'clock. We have encountered a severe trough. I fear it could be the dreaded 'El Nino' trough."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 14, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #floyd, #killed, #Wally, #alice, #first, #aid, #ambulance, #firstaid, #phone, #ted

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Wally, Ted and Alice confront Dilbert. Alice says, "We heard you killed Floyd, our unbearable co-worker, yesterday." Dilbert replies, "No. I was there, but he choked on his own bile." Alice asks, "What did you do - perform First Aid? Call an ambulance?" Dilbert replies, "I don't know First Aid." Dilbert asks, "Uh . . . Can I use your phone?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 16, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #elbonia, #elbonians, #erupted, #civil, #war, #interview, #weapons, #taking

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Dogbert sits on the hassock watching tv. A newscaster says, "The tiny nation of Elbonia erupted in civil war." In Elbonia, a television reporter holds a microphone toward two Elbonians and asks, "What caused you to turn your weapons on your own people?" One Elbonian asks, "Weapons? We can use weapons?" The other Elbonian puts his hands on his hips and says, "Well, no wonder it was taking so long."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 07, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #humor, #workplace, #tension, #employee, #Wally, #alice

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The Boss says to Dilbert, Wally and a woman, "I've decided to use humor in the workplace." The Boss continues, "Experts say humor eases tension which is important in times when the workforce is being trimmed." The Boss says to an employee, "Knock-knock." The man asks, "Who's there?" The Boss answers, "Not you anymore."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 08, 1992's comic on:


Tags #humor, #Dilbert, #the boss, #tension, #engineers, #lightbulb, #appraisal

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Dilbert sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "I'm going to use humor to ease the tension during your annual job performance appraisal." The Boss asks, "How many engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?" Dilbert says, "I don't know." The Boss says, "Well, that's consistent with your appraisal." Dilbert says, "Wait . . . I'll say three."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 11, 1992's comic on:


Tags #violence, #the boss, #Dilbert, #alice, #ted, #program, #humor, #kick me, #relaxed, #creative, #advantage, #situation

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The Boss hands a sign to Dilbert, Alice and Ted. The Boss says, "As part of my program to use more humor at work, I'm asking each of you to wear a 'kick me' sign." The Boss tapes a sign to Dilbert's back and says, "I'll check later to see if you're more relaxed and creative." Later, the Boss says to Alice, "You seem to be taking unfair advantage of the situation, Alice." Dilbert and two male co-workers stand covering their groins and looking like they are in pain.