Answer Question Comic Strips - Page 6

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

392 Results for Answer Question

View 51 - 60 results for answer question comic strips. Discover the best "Answer Question" comics from Dilbert.com.

Getting The Wrong Answer

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Getting The Wrong Answer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 12, 2017's comic on:


Tags #budget, #spending, #Advice, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: As you can see from my financial projections, doing a major upgrade now would be unwise. Boss: I need to spend my entire budget this year so they won't give me a smaller budget next year. Dilbert: It seems you have wasted my time. Boss: It's not my fault you got the wrong answer.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 21, 2017's comic on:


Tags #friendship, #closeness, #favor, #benefit, #debate, #relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: Can you give me a ride to the airport on Saturday? Dilbert: My attorney will answer that question. Dogbert: The evidence will show that you are not the kind of friend who qualifies for airport rides. I will prove beyond a reasonable doubt that you are what is called a "work friend." A background check with your family and acquaintances will show that you are unlikely to ever reciprocate. In short, there is no social or monetary reason for Dilbert to agree to your unreasonable request. Tina: Maybe he just wants to be nice. Dogbert: The evidence would suggest otherwise.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 19, 2017's comic on:


Tags #communication, #mumbling, #speech, #understanding

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: What's the URL for the test site? Boss: Ask Amy. Dilbert; Amy is a mumbler. I can't understand a word she says. Boss; Just ask her to speak up. Dilbert: I've tried that. All she does is mumble louder. And whenever I ask her a question by email, she answers the wrong question. If the only person who knows the URL for the test site is Amy, we probably need to build a new site and tell someone else the URL. Amy might be the most useless employee in the entire company. Wally: Can you teach me to mumble? Amy: Mumble, mumble, mumble. Narrator: Get your own system.

Days Off Versus More Pay

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Days Off Versus More Pay - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 04, 2017's comic on:


Tags #catch-22, #wages, #trick question, #vacation, #compensation, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Would you rather have more days off or more pay? Alice: Days off. Dilbert: Days off. Wally: Days off. Boss: You were right-- we're paying them too much.

Won't Take No For An Answer

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Won't Take No For An Answer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 21, 2016's comic on:


Tags #deadline, #honesty, #trick, #rejection

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Can you finish this by Friday? I won't take no for an answer. Dilbert: In that case, my answer is yes. Boss: I knew you wouldn't disappoint me. Dilbert: I think we just planned that for Friday.

Forgot To Go To Pre Meeting Corrected

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Forgot To Go To Pre Meeting   Corrected - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 20, 2016's comic on:


Tags #deception, #lying, #deadline, #boss, #executive

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: Is the software finished as your boss promised me it would be? Dilbert: I forgot to go to the pre-meeting for this meeting, so I'll guess the answer is.. yes? CEO: Okay, keep up the good work! Dilbert: Thanks goodness he doesn't know what the truth even looks like.

Followship Training

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Followship Training - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 17, 2016's comic on:


Tags #leadership, #following, #lazy, #work ethic, #motivation

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I'm too busy to take a leaders hip class, so I'm sending all of you to a followship class. Dilbert: Is that so we can learn how to follow someone who never learned to lead? Boss: That sounds like a good question for your followship teacher.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 23, 2016's comic on:


Tags #email, #communication, #response, #confusion, #honesty, #overshare

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Did you see my email? Dilbert; Did you mean your two-page document that has about twelve questions for me sprinkled throughout? Man: Yes, that's the one. Why haven't you responded? Dilbert: It's hard to answer that question while being polite. Man: You can be honest. Dilbert: Your email was such a disorganized mess that I assumed everything you do is doomed to fail. I didn't want to waste half a day deciphering it just so I could be on the losing side. With you. Man: Next time, just say you were busy. Dilbert: And I was busy.

The Long Email

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
The Long Email - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 31, 2016's comic on:


Tags #communication, #laziness, #email, #tldr

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You never got back to me with your answer. Dilbert: Yes, I did. I spent three hours writing an email that tells you all you need to know. Boss: What did it say?

I Own You

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
I Own You - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 06, 2016's comic on:


Tags #honesty, #work ethic, #communication, #text, #control

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Why didn't you answer my text last night? Dilbert: Um... Boss: You have no social life, and you aren't dead, so there's no excuse. I own you! Dilbert: Whoever said honest is refreshing never heard any.